


Falling in Love a Little At a Time

by themadmaiden



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Insecurity, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Slow Burn, pre-war america sucked
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-06 01:02:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 40,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11025291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themadmaiden/pseuds/themadmaiden
Summary: Nick Valentine is stuck in a vault. He's life you could say isn't at its finest. However when a strange vault suit wearing woman shows up and breaks him out he ends up on a new case that brings more change into his life then he could possibly imagine.Aka: POV from Nick as he gets pulled into the life of recently thawed out Kim Nguyen, former prewar lawyer who is searching for her son. Along the way he starts to realize that his emotions and who or what he is aren't as black and white as he's always thought and that his friends are willing to defend him against anyone who says anything against him, even himself. Oh and somehow he falls in love along the way. He's really not sure how that happened.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I've actually had this one finished for a while. It's just taken me a while to get up the courage to post things so I started with a shorter thing. 
> 
> This was all written in one piece so hopefully the chapter breaks aren't distracting. Also wow, I forgot how much summery's suck to write.

It’s not love at first sight. Nothing that dramatic. The other factors of the their first meeting are more then enough to make up for it though.

Nick Valentine had been starting to lose hope after three full weeks locked in a room he couldn’t seem to pick or talk his his way out of. Frequent arguments between gang members about whether or not they should just kill him and a goon posted at the door at all times just added to his troubles. Sure Skinny Malone hadn’t killed him yet but the possibility was becoming more real as time went on. It wasn’t a pleasant thought and since no one but Ellie knew where he’d gone, he wasn’t in line for a rescue any time soon. At least he hoped not. If Ellie got drawn down here and hurt because of him he’d never forgive himself.

Someone however does show up. At first he doesn’t know what’s going on, just that the goon he’d been goading suddenly gets shot in the head from the side and he realizes there’s someone else out there. Someone clearly not a fan of the Triggermen. Not one to miss a chance he attempts to yell them over to get him out before the rest of the damn hornets nest wakes up.

The woman that runs over to the terminal by the door is an unknown but he’d take anything he could get at this point considering the situation. She looks like a vault dweller; suit, pip-boy and everything. And she seems to know at least something about terminals as she takes to hacking it without much prompting. It gives him a moment to realize that she’s not alone. There’s a Mr. Handy of all things floating up next to her in front of the window. There’s few of those around that aren’t trying to kill you on sight or reprogrammed by a gang like the Gunners. He somehow doubts he’s being rescued by the Gunners.

Luckily he gets his wits together by the time the door is opened, so when she walks in he throws out a comment about the reverse damsel in distress scenario. The day he doesn’t have a quip to hide his confusion is the day he knows he’s really in trouble.

He notices the startled expression on her face as he steps into the light and the eyes looking him up and down. He’s used to it by now. However he is a bit surprised by how quickly she seems to hide it again.

Meanwhile the answer he does get about why she’s freeing him, changes the person in front of him from an unknown to a much more familiar concept. She’s looking for a detective to help her track down someone. There’s hints that it’s a lot more complicated then she can explain at the moment but they can go over that later. Potential client. That makes things a lot easier and a lot less confusing and they start to make their way back out of the vault. 

What he observes about her on the way out is that she’s not the best shot by far. Fresh from that vault maybe, but she manages to hold her own as they fight their way out. However what really surprises him is when they meet with Skinny Malone, Darla aka; the young lady he thought he’d come here to rescue and a posse of other goons. Expecting to take the lead, he starts talking to Skinny. However Darla brings up his new companion and she takes a step forward, gun lowered.

Bracing himself for a fight to break out. Nick watches as the vault dweller speaks directly back to Darla. She has a strong, steady voice now. One that says, I know what I’m saying, listen to me and I can help you. She talks to Darla about returning home.

“You have a family that loves you. That wants you back, no matter what. Are you really going to throw that away?”

He’s listening to them but keeping his eye more on Skinny and his goons so he misses whatever expressions pass over Darla’s face as she processes what the vault dweller is saying.

 “I.....I ....” And to his surprise the woman he’d given up as lost to the gang, falters and then agrees to return home.

“This is goodbye.” Always the dramatic though, Darla runs off. Nick can see a smile of some sort on the face of the vault dweller but is now paying much more attention to Skinny. Who is pissed.

Luckily his own talking skills start to come in handy again and he negotiates them a ten second head start to scram before the gang starts firing. It’s more then enough. 

-

Outside the sewer they exit, he gets a better look at his rescuer. She’s shorter then him with dark black hair cut off at her neck. Aside from the vault suit with pieces of leather armour thrown on, she’s also wearing a bag thrown around her shoulder and what looks like a postman’s hat with a pair of glasses that she’s pushing up the bridge of her nose. The woman is also being fussed over by the Mr. Handy but is laughing while she brushes off his concern with wry amusement.

“I’m fine Codsworth, really. No bullets this time at all. Okay a bruise here and there from those damn bats but I’ll be fine. I promise.”’

He hates to interrupt the strange scene, most people don’t tend to treat robots as more then annoyances at best, but they are still in the middle of the commons. So he coughs slightly to get her attention. It does and she turns to look at him, face serious again.

“Right. Detective Valentine. Are you still willing to help me with my case?”

“Well you did just get me out of a pickle back there so I already owe you one. Come back to the office with me and we’ll get all the details sorted out and start from there.”

The look of relief on the woman’s face is at least familiar. When you’re surrounded by people who are too scared to even talk about missing people let alone help, just being told that someone is willing to try is enough to light up peoples faces. He’d be lying if he said that wasn’t one of the perks of his job.

Hope is a tricky thing though.

They walk back to Diamond City together. He learns her name is Kim. Kim Tu Nguyen-Wilson as her Mr. Handy corrects but she corrects him.

“Just Kim is fine Codsworth. And it’s Kim Tu Nguyen now, remember?”

And he spots her rubbing a finger where a wedding ring sits. Ah.

-

They manage to get to Diamond City and back to the agency without any hostile encounters. And as he gets grabbed in a hug and lecture from his assistant, Ellie reveals that she’s the one who told Kim where to find him. Kim also gets a hug. Nick is pretty sure Ellie would try to hug Codsworth if there wasn’t the giant buzzsaw in the way there. She thanks him anyway to which he replies politely.

She even goes out of her way to suggest that Nick take the new women on as a partner. So either she’s been hatching a plan to get him to not work alone again for a while now, or the three weeks he’s been gone have been enough for her. Either way he puts it aside for later, they have a new case, office disputes always come after their clients needs.

-

And what a case it is. It’s hard to wrap his head around and Ellie keeps sending him odd looks but the woman before them is prewar. Or at least says she is. However her entire case relies on the fact that she was in cryo and he’s pretty sure she’d drag him to the vault and show him herself if he questioned it, so he’s inclined to believe her. That and there’s the air of not quite fitting in that’s around her.

She sits and answers all the questions they have for her though. Even the painful ones. He’s not found of forcing his clients to recite their worst memories for strangers, but every detail does help.

“He....shot him. ...oh god he shot him right in front of me and I ...I couldn’t do anything. I just...hit the glass over and over and...”

Ellie steps in, like she always does when the emotions start to overwhelm their clients.

“You’re doing great. Just take a deep breath. And when you’re ready, tell us what happened next.”

Kim takes a moment to do so while wiping her eyes under her glasses. Her voice is calmer but a bit detached as she describes how the group took her son and put her back under ice. That’s the hard part of the case right there. They don’t know when she woke up the first time and they don’t know how much time had passed since then. She says it’s been at least a month since she’s been awake on the outside.

However they follow the details she can give them about the people she did see and narrow it down to a likely culprit.

Kellogg.

And possibly the Institute. Which is the worse news but they don’t have confirmation yet so there’s still a chance. What they do have is a lead, which is a hell of a lot more then he’d thought they’d get when she’d started her story.

\--

They end up putting her and Codsworth up for the night as it’s too dark to go and investigate. He has to admit he’s intrigued now. Here’s someone else from the prewar era that isn’t a ghoul. His flashes of memories of the Real Nick Valentine are all he has of that time period but it’s more then most.

While Kim sleeps, and Codsworth hovers next to her, Ellie gives him another lecture on wandering off alone.

“Just promise me you’ll consider taking on a partner. Please. If anything happened to you....”

“You’ll be out of a job?” He attempts to lighten the mood with a wry smile and she rolls her eyes but not without some amusement.

“Exactly. Now I’m going to sleep. If you three leave before I wake up, you’d better leave a note.”

The or else hangs in the air and he decides he’d rather not risk her wrath. Besides she was only worrying about him which was more then an old bot like him deserved.

He spends the night writing up the case log and putting together leads. Occasionally Codsworth quietly asks him a question and when he finds he has noting else to add to the file he puts it to the side and spends the rest of the night chatting with the polite robot. A prewar butler it seems. One of the few that didn’t go crazy. He speaks highly of Kim, or Ms Kim as he calls her. It’s not an unpleasant way to spend a night he realizes.


	2. Chapter 2

When the morning arrives, he lets Codsworth go wake Kim up while he sets up a note to leave out for Ellie on her desk. She’s still sleeping which makes him wonder how many late nights she’d been staying up hoping he’d come back. The thought doesn’t sit well with him.

Kim meanwhile has convinced Codsworth to head back home and leave the search to her. It takes a bit of a debate but in the end the robot agrees that someone has to be looking after the homestead while she’s gone. From her fond expression, Nick can tell she just doesn’t want the robot to get hurt in whatever happens next. He can respect that. There’s no telling what they’ll run into chasing after a guy like Kellogg. For example the house they locate has a much tougher lock then it should and in the end he suggests she go and ask the mayor for a spare key. He wouldn’t expect much of it, the mayor isn’t the most generous of souls but she did talk down Carla from taking a bat to their heads so maybe there’s hope.

And there is because eventually she returns to the house with the key and a story about Piper yelling at the mayor through a door. He just sighs at the latter. He couldn’t blame Piper for wanting to get to the truth, that’s what he did after all but he wasn’t quite sure what yelling at the mayor was going to accomplish. Maybe it’s therapeutic or something but he worries one of these days she’ll get in real trouble for it.

Meanwhile they investigate the seemingly normal house for clues and find a hidden room. It’s overly stocked for a small house in what is reportedly a peaceful city but they do find some clues.

-

And then they’re off on the case. He’s reintroduced to Dogmeat, a dog he’d run into a few times over the years and they run after him to track Kellogg scent down.

It’s her case now, he’d made that clear to her at Kellogg’s house. If she needed to take on the bastard who killed her husband alone he’d step aside. It seemed like the right thing to do but when he’d asked but she’d just looked at him with an odd expression for a moment. Thankfully that passed quickly and she simply shook her head.

“Thanks, but I think I’m going to need help with this one.”

And that’s that. They fall into a more comfortable travelling style once they’re outside Diamond City. Kim knowing vaguely where there should be shortcuts and Nick knowing if said shortcuts still exist. And aren’t filled with radiation or super mutants.

Along the way he answers what questions he can about the state of world around them as she thinks of them. She’s been up here for a month or so, but its been something of a crash course she says. He doesn’t mind and she doesn’t seem to mind either when he finds himself asking questions in return about her.

-

“You were a what?” He shoots a feral ghouls head off and stomps on one trying to attack his foot.

“A lawyer.” The woman calls out. “Former prosecutor. Gave it up when I had my kid.”

Of all the people he ends up with and it’s someone else connected to the law. He bites down the urge to ask if she knew a detective with the same name as his, but she probably would have brought it up if she had. At least he hopes so....or maybe not. He’s never sure when it comes to his tacked on personality.

“You shoot pretty well for a lawyer.” Is all he says.

“Thanks! Preston says the General of the Minutemen should be able to shoot half a damn so he gave me some lessons. Pretty sure Ethan taught me a few things back before-” she gets distracted for a moment, smashing a feral in the head as Dogmeat bites its leg. “-apparently it didn’t stick. Or who knows, more then a few of my prewar memories seem to be a bit of a mess at the moment. Probably the who knows how long ice nap.”

They stand there for a moment and he looks over at her, leaning over to catch her breath. He’s not sure what to say to the last part but the first is more then enough to draw his attention.

“Did you say General?”

She looks up and grins at him, and something inside twists a little, nothing too obvious for the moment but when he looks back he realizes that this is where it really starts.

“What, didn’t I tell you I got made General of the Minutemen?”

“Must have slipped your mind.” He looks around just to make sure there are no more ferals with missing limbs trying to crawl at them.

“Yeah it was strange for me too.” Kim reloads her gun as they set off again. “I said no a few times but Preston and Codsworth talked me into it. They seem better then any prewar army at least, want to help people. Which is good, otherwise I would have kicked them out of my town.”

Not actually her town as it turned out, though she claimed as the only living prewar resident that gave her the right to it. He was pretty sure that wasn’t in any law books but then again most of the law books were burnt now.

They continued to follow Dogmeat all the way to a fort.

-

It’s a good hideout, Nick will give the man that. Kim’s face meanwhile is hard and just grows harder as they fight their way through synths and make it down to the basement where Kellogg is hiding.

His voice is the first to great them though and Nick can see the anger growing in Kim as the mercenary mocks her through the intercom. She’s getting distracted and when she smashes a synth so hard with her gun it nearly goes flying he makes sure the room is clear then approaches her slowly.

“I know this is the last thing you want to hear right now doll but you need to calm down.”

She whirls to face him and he can see the fury in her eyes. “That bastard has my son, Valentine.”

He keeps his own voice calm. “I know, and we’re going to get him back I promise. But right now that bastard’s sitting there, riling you up so you’re an easier target. Don’t let him have that.”

Kim stares at him for a moment and then takes a deep breath and sits down on semi broken chair.

“I hate this mindset.” She mutters as she closes her eyes for a moment. He looks away as it seems like a private thing but he can hear her vaguely muttering then a few deep breaths.

“Okay, let’s go.” And as she gets up she sounds calmer, but the emotion is gone from her face. She looks......he doesn’t like the look on her face. It’s no longer anger. Just coldness and it’s a far cry from the woman cracking jokes on the trip up here.

They walk and fight in silence the rest of the way, Kim now ignoring Kellogg completely. Nick sometimes hearing her mutter something under her breath but that seems more repetitive then in response to the voice.

When they reach the final room she pauses and without thinking Nick puts his hand on her shoulder.

“Are you-”

“Fine.” Her reply is cold and he winces slightly. It’s like speaking to a completely different woman. He hopes she can snap out of it. He’s hoping this doesn’t break her.

He supposes it depends on what’s on the other side of the door though.

-

What’s on the other side of the door is a bastard and a small army of synths. Kim demands to know where her son is, voice still cold and icy but the man just chuckles and it takes a few more threats from the woman to drag the story out of him.

Shaun isn’t here right now. He’s safe...at the Institute. She doesn’t take the answer well and demands to either go there or to bring him to her.

It just leads to the fight that all three of them knew was going to happen. Nick tries to focus on the synths attacking from the sides as Kim makes a beeline for the now invisible Kellogg. Her gun skills might not be the best, but she’s making up for it in her refusal to let the man escape with his life.

Eventually Kellogg and his synths lie dead around them and Kim swerves around, not even slowing down.

“Proof, evidence. I need evidence. He could be lying.” She’s talking to herself now but spots a terminal and runs over to it.

While she does this, he looks around the area, picking out some of the spare ammo that got dropped in the fight. Trying to find any clues in the rubble.

-

“Damn it!”

And she’s found her proof. Nick walks slowly over as Kim sits in the chair, wiping some blood off her cheek. The coldness seems to be slowly seeping out of her face, as she’s showing real emotions again. If she wasn’t so upset, he’d be relieved.

“Look.” She points to the screen where the message is. “He is there.”

“Damn.” Nick mutters as he reads the email and Kim rubs her forehead.

“There has to be some way in. People like him get out. Then there has to be a way in.”

“People have been trying to solve that mystery for ages. I don’t even know where the place is and hell they built me.”

That gets her attention as he knew it would. Most people around here would know he was made by the Institute, after all there weren’t any other places that built synths. But Kim, she was brand new.

“They did?”

“Yup. I’m just a busted up old prototype though. Only reason I can think of why they threw me out.”

Kim however gives him another look over. It makes him a bit nervous this time. Though he didn’t know why. It wasn’t something he hid. It wasn’t something he could hide.

“We have to find a way.” Was the only thing she said after that though and she got up slowly. “Do you want to take a look at the terminal a bit more? I might have missed something. I’m going to see if he had anything on him. A map is probably too much to hope for but...maybe."

Nick nods and trades places with her. As he sits down though she stands next to him for a moment and puts her hand briefly on his shoulder.

“And...Nick. Thank you.”

He knows he looks a bit startled at that but quickly covers it up with a smile an amused voice. “All part of the job.”

He doesn’t see her expression but she goes off to find the dead Kellogg and he gets himself to work.

-

He doesn’t find anything helpful, though the desk does reveal some stimpacks that he grabs for the road. Kim meanwhile finds a few things worth keeping if only to sell.

“Wow. I think this was ...part of him.” Kim commented as she pulled something off. “I regret pulling on that now.”

A moment later and there’s another tugging sound.

“I regret pulling on this even more.” She held up something and showed it to him as he turns around.

“That’s....” Nick paused, not really sure how to put it.

“Part of a brain.” Kim confirmed then looked at it for a moment then grabbed one of the white containers and shoved it in.

“Souvenir?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Please, I’m not some second-rate serial killer. If anything we can scrape the brain off and get at the tech it’s attached to.”

Nick shrugged. That was the wasteland for you, apparently she was learning fast. At least she seemed to be coming back around to emotions again. “You’re carrying it then.”

“Fine but then you get these metal things. I want to sell those.” She leaned over and picked something up. “Hey it’s his gun....”

She trailed off as she stared at it in her hands.

“.....he killed Ethan with this gun.” Her voice was slightly numb as she stared at it.

“Want to get rid of it then?” Nick glanced over at it. “Or you could sell it.”

Kim investigated the gun and held it up to look at. “Maybe. Or maybe I’ll take what was his and use it against everything he worked for.” She shrugged and got up. “Let’s get out of here Nick. We can brainstorm somewhere not surrounded by bodies.”

-

“Hey,” he got her attention as she started to bag the rest of the stuff they were bringing back. “Chin up. I know the night just got darker, but it won’t last forever.”

He received a smile in return. A sad one true, but it was a smile. And her voice was lighter as she replied.

“You know just what to say Nick.”

Her reply made his smile a little more real but then he paused. There was blood dripping down her forehead still.

“Push your bangs up.”

She looked at him oddly. “What?”

“You’re bleeding.” Was his simple reply as he took her bag away from her. “Let me see.”

“Shit.” She pulled up her hair and sure enough there was a not so nice looking gash on her forehead that was still dripping. “How bad is it?” She reached up to touch it and then swore, taking her hand back and looking at the blood on it.

“I think you’ll survive.” He replied, keeping his voice light as he pulled out a medkit. “We can bandage you up but you might need stitches. You’re going to see Doctor Sun when we get back.”

“Great.” She sighed but took the offered help of putting the bandage on. He was careful with his metal hand and they got it on alright. He almost asked about the scar on the side of her face that had been hidden behind her hair but decided it really wasn’t any of his business.

“There good as new.”

Kim smirked as she softly put her postman hat on top. “Guess next stop is Diamond city.”

“Yeah and actually I think I have an idea for our next stop there after the doc’s.”


	3. Chapter 3

He voiced his suggestion that they bring in Piper in as a consultant and Kim agreed as she apparently liked Piper from her few meetings with the women. As they were making their way up and out of the building. Nick could suddenly hear something loud coming from outside and as Kim used the terminal to turn off the turrets and open the door to the roof he realized with a sinking feeling what it was.

“What the....” Kim stared up as they stepped out into the fading light.

An automated voice from a giant blimp with vertibirds flying off above them bellowed the answer.

_< <We are the Brotherhood of Steel>>_

 

They watched in silent wonder, or horror, he wasn’t sure which as the blimp and its speakers passed them by, continuing to offer claims of peace and the like. Lost in thought he found himself musing to himself.

“Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing....” This changed a lot of things, and not just for him.

“Didn’t take you for Poe fan.” Kim replied, snapping him out of his daze. Nick shrugged, still slightly put off by the sight.

“He’s got a way with words.”

“He does.” They stood there in silence for a moment before Kim started to talk again. Looking off in the distance at the blimp flying away.

“The Brotherhood of Steel..... I actually met up with a few of them already here. They were holed up in a police station. Helped them survive a feral ghoul attack and then got hired to help them find some salvage. Fought some Institute synths that were there. Got a pretty good gun out it and the leader asked if I wanted to join up.”

“Did he now.” Nick kept his voice neutral. “And what was your answer?”

She looked over at him then. “What do you think?”

That was the problem, he wasn’t sure what to think. They’d been travelling together for only a short amount of time and while he did have a good feeling about her, who knows how much the Brotherhood actually told her about their beliefs and what she’d thought at the time.

When he didn’t answer Kim shook her head. “I said thanks but no thanks. I told you, the Minutemen barely got me to join up with them. I don’t trust armies. The guys I met and helped at the police station were a suspicious jackass, a nice woman who deserved better and their leader; who was every die hard, ask no questions soldier I’d been hoping died out with the rest of that world.”

She scoffed and imitated someone, apparently the leader. _‘It’s corporations like this that put the nail in the coffin of mankind’_. Yeah like you were there. I know I missed a lot but apparently the cult of mindless obedience to a military never goes out of fashion.”

She stopped for a moment then waved her hands in the air.  “They didn’t even give me a chance to explain that I knew what their stupid ‘ad victoriam’ meant. I took law! I know Latin!”

Nick couldn’t help but laugh. There was a bit of relief in there but also it was amusing to hear someone rip apart the brotherhood like that. “You’ve been holding that one in for a while?”

“Latin was really hard okay.” But there was amusement in her voice again.

She stayed silent for a moment and then shook her head. “Besides they apparently want to kill all synths and even non feral ghouls.” He can see her frown. “Preston had already told me they’re just as normal as humans though so I didn’t buy it.”

“He said that about synths and ghouls?” Nick raised an eyebrow.

“Well ghouls, I had to ask him what they were when I first met him. He was a bit confused by that until I told him about the whole cryo thing. I met some later on and they were just as human as anyone else I’d met. Just less skin and they actually understood half my jokes when everyone else just looks at me like I’m nuts.”

This woman was a mystery “So let me get this straight, the only synths you met before me were trying to kill you? And-” And what? She didn’t shoot at him on sight or demand more answers about what he was? He’s not sure what he wants to ask. Luckily she counters back before he has to think of it.

“Yeah and if I’d happened to meet only feral ghouls before actual ghouls, then I should hate all ghouls?” She shrugs. “Besides, I know hate speech when I hear it.” She pauses as though unsure how to continue. “Nick. I don’t know how much you guys know about prewar America here.”

He had to stop himself from saying anything but stayed silent as she continued.

“We were really good at hating large groups of people back then. I mean, really good. Replace synths with Communists and you have prewar America....though add more paranoia and military presence. It was stupid but everyone bought into it. And if they didn’t.....” She looked at her pip-boy, trailing off for a moment. “I refuse to live like that again. That was my entire life growing up, fearing death by a group of people I was trained to hate. Then I lived through the end of the world. I’m not going to go through that again, just because they have new people to label as threats to humanity.”

He was about to say something when she looked over at him and met his eyes.

“Besides, I’ve met you so now I know they’re completely full of bullshit. You’re the only one who’s helped me this much without asking anything in return. Without you, I’d never even know if my son was still alive. I can’t thank you enough.”

Nick looked down, hat covering his eyes. “Watch it, you’re going to make me blush sweetheart. Besides I’m sure you’d have figured something out.”

“Yeah it’s called getting hopelessly lost.” Kim thankfully took his out and jumped down a few stairs. “Back to Diamond City then?”

“Diamond City.” He agreed as he followed her down the stairs.

\--

They ended having to stay on the second floor of an abandoned building for the night. They weren't close enough that making their way through the super mutant and raider infested areas around the city was worth it.

Kim, after checking on her bandage, picked out some food from her bag and slumped down against the wall.

“I’m guessing you don’t eat?” She asked as she looked of at Nick who was sitting across from her.

“What, because of my slim figure?” He smirked. “Nope, No sleep either. Not like those fancy gen 3’s that are running around scaring everyone.”

“You’re missing on so many wonderful flavours.” Kim replied as she bit into a tato, then looked down at it. “....I need to learn to cook.”

“I've heard it can help. What, not up to your prewar standards?”

She laughed at that, which made him smile.

“Prewar standards. Sure. Food might have tasted better but I think I’ve had an easier time getting it here then I did back then.”

He frowned slightly, he only got flashes of pre war memories so he never got a full view of what everything was like back then. But Kim was back to eating so he held his questions for another time.

-

“Now prewar beds I do miss.” Kim replied after she’d finished eating. “Good thing I brought my clothes pillow.”

She pulled some clothes out of her bag and pilled them up on the floor. However she just leaned back against the wall after doing so.

“So if you don’t sleep what are you going to do for the night?”

He shrugged. “Wait, keep an eye out for trouble mostly.”

“Sounds boring.”

“You get used to it.”

“I suppose so.”

She leaned on an arm and looked at her pip-boy with another. The tiredness was starting to show on her face. He might as well ask now.

“Hey, Kim?”

“Yeah?” He must have sounded too worried because she looked up at him. “Is, something wrong?”

Nick almost sighed. He really wasn’t the greatest at this sort of thing but still. He felt it was important to ask. “Well I was going to ask you the same thing actually. Just with everything’s that’s happened. Today, days before, with your family....”

He trailed off but she sighed and looked at her pip-boy. “I....don’t really know. I mean I’ve got Codsworth still. So that was a relief, even after losing Ethan....and Shaun and well....probably everyone else in the bombs. I still have some family. Finding Preston and the Minutemen helped. And now there’s you and Ellie and Piper....I shouldn’t feel too sorry for myself I guess. I’m pretty lucky all things considered.”

And he had to smile at that, he was starting to get a read on this woman and while strange, it was a nice feeling. So he opened up and admitted to her that when he’d first started out he’d been much worse then she’d been like.

Of course that brought up questions like the broken mask incident and the massacre of the CPG. However his story of rescuing the mayors daughter made her laugh, especially his imitation of a bomb. And after that he told her how he slowly became part of Diamond City, first as a handyman then as a Detective.

“It took me a long time to realize that home is where you make it. With some time and effort, this place can be home for you too.” He pulled his hat down a bit. “Long story I know, but I hope it helps.”

“Nick.” She got him to look up from under his hat. “Thanks. You really have helped me. A lot.”

He wanted to have a quip back to that. Cut down the seriousness in the statement. But he just found himself nodding.

“Glad to hear it.”

She yawned then lay down against her makeshift pillow. “Wake me if there’s any trouble.”

“If there is, you’ll probably hear it.” He replied, then went silent as she closed her eyes.

He took a quick moment to run a diagnosis then settled in for the night. Setting himself up a chair to sit on and look out the non boarded up window at the night sky and the surrounding area.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kim really, really isn't a fan of armies.


	4. Chapter 4

They survived the night without any attacks and after Kim ate something and they gathered their things they were back on the road to Diamond City.

This time they had make a few detours because of super-mutant gangs but they managed to get back in fairy good time considering.

“Doctor first.” Nick said as Kim made to walk over to Piper’s door.

She opened her mouth to say something but then sighed. “Fine. It’s the one with the weird chem set right?”

“Yeah, come on. I’ll introduce you to Doctor Sun.”

-

The Doctor was luckily in, or out as it were, standing in front of his establishment.

“Hey Doc, got a patient for you.”

“What have you brought me this time Valentine?” The man looked at him then over at Kim. “You look better then most cases he brings me.”

“Just a forehead cut. Want to make sure it doesn’t need stitches.”

“Very well.” He turned to Kim who was taking her hat off. “Let’s see.”

Nick moved to the side trying to give her some privacy, even if it was only a head wound. Right, only a head wound. When were those ever good?

-

It didn’t take long though.

“Change the bandage twice a day and come back here right away if it looks infected at all.” He looked around to see Kim passing over some caps to the Doctor. She’d got a better bandage job on her head at least.

“Sure thing Doc.” She nodded and placed her hat back on. “Thanks.”

“Try not to need to come see me that often.” The doctor shook his head and then went back to his work.

“Probably going to scar but no stitches.” She grinned to Nick as she hopped down.

“Well at least that’s something. Want to head to Pipers house now?”

“In a second. The market reminded me I wanted to sell that metal thing and some of the stuff I found. Plus I want to check in on that robot salesman.”

“You mean Takahashi?”

She didn’t seem to hear him though and instead of going to the robot at the noodle stand she walked past it and up to Myna’s store. He followed behind her.

“Wait, where’s Percy?”

Nick sighed. Myrna as always got in the first word.

“Oh no. You’re not allowed to shop here. No synths.” She glared at him, but he was pretty used to it by now.

“Good to see you too Myrna. And I’m not shopping, my friend here is.”

Myrna turned to glare at Kim.

“And who are you? A friend of a synth huh? How do I know you’re not a synth yourself?”

“Uh....what?” Kim glanced over at Nick then back. “Um, I bought stuff here a few nights ago. There was a robot here?”

“Of course there was. He works nights. Now answer the question, are you a synth?”

“You have a robot working for you and you refuse to serve synths?” Kim had folded her arms at this point.

Myrna glared at her. “He works here because I know he’s not a synth. You’re stalling, you’re a synth aren’t you!”

“No actually but I don’t support discrimination-”

“That’s just what a synth would say!” Myrna interrupted, slamming her hands on her counter as though she’d just proved her point.

“ **Objection!** ” Nick blinked as Kim’s arm shot up and pointed at the women who stumbled back a bit. “You have no evidence. In fact you have no way to get evidence from what I hear. Your policies are just paranoia and hatred. If there were real laws in this world you’d be shut down for discrimination.”

The market seemed to fall silent for a moment. And Kim looked at her arm for the first time and slowly lowered it.

“Ah....sorry, old lawyer instincts.”

\--

“And that’s how I got banned from Myrna’s store.” Kim finished as Piper continued to laugh on the couch.

“And almost got arrested.” Nick filled in dryly. “And started a riot.”

“Oh come on Nick, some of the guards were laughing too. Like that one in the sunglasses, and half the other store owners. Besides I only got a talking to about my behaviour by a guard who was trying his best to keep a straight face.”

“Still, next time let’s just avoid the whole thing. Alright?” This woman was something else.

“I miss the best moments.” Piper wiped her eyes. “I wonder if I can get an article out of that. Prewar America sounds like a great place if they had laws like that though.”

This however made Kim pause and then burst out laughing. “Oh god no. The ones we had were terrible. There’s no way I’d have done anything like that back then. Fuck, I’d probably have been arrested and then sent to a Chinese Interment camp with my entire family or something.”

Nick glanced over at her as her laughter died down. She shrugged too easily as if it were nothing.

“I got ‘confused’ for Chinese sometimes, it was hinted it could happen ‘by accident’ a few times as well if I didn’t follow orders.” She made air quotes as she talked, disturbingly at ease with what she was saying.

“Shit Blue.” Piper started but Kim interrupted, brushing it aside.

“Anyway, I meant what real laws should be like.” She paused. “I read a lot of law books I probably wasn’t supposed to when I was in law school. There ‘s always rebel groups. Ours was actual human rights. We disbanded after one of our members was vanished. We never talked to each other again just in case, but apparently it was either for something else or he never turned us in.”

She looked to see them both staring at her.

“What, pre-war life wasn’t a fun place.”

“I’m ...starting to get the picture.” Piper had taken her pencil from behind her ear. “I might be able to get a story from that then. Might make people realize what we have out here isn’t so bad.”

“After the case.” Nick replied and Kim nodded.

“Right, right. So fill me in.”

\--

So they did. Piper got a few good swears in on Kim’s behalf and dragged out her files she’d collected on anything related to the institute.

After Nick had a brainwave, they had a new idea. Even if it was a bit gross.

Kim looked down at the open white case in her hands. “Well now I feel less crazy for taking this with me.”

“Blue, really?” Piper held up her hands so she couldn’t see it.

“I thought it was attached to his head, not part of it!”

“Well it might just be the answers were looking for. You ever been to Goodneighbour?” He looked at Kim as he asked this.

“No?” She paused. “Do they have someone I can sell junk too who isn’t a paranoid bigot?”

“Well there’s Daisy, she’s a prewar ghoul so I think you’re safe on that count.” Nick replied. “Are we all going then?”

Piper thought it over. “You two go. I’ll comb my files for anything else useful on the Institute while you’re gone in case you need more info when you get back.”

“Thanks Piper.” Kim smiled and got up. “Liked the article by the way.”

“Thanks!” She looked over at Nick, “I got an interview from our vault dweller here. You read it yet?”

“Haven’t had that much time since I got back Piper.”

“Right, you missed some good articles. Just a second.” Piper got up and went to the pile of boxes to the side and ruffled through them.

“Okay here. Newest issue of the best paper in the commonwealth. Don’t say I never give you anything Valentine.”

He shook his head with a laugh. “I wouldn’t dare.” He folded the papers to put in his pocket.

“Ready to hit the road partner?”

“Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Pre-war America really sucked, like a lot.  
> 2\. Kim's family is Vietnamese American if the last name didn't give it away already  
> 3\. I can't promise that will be the only Ace Attorney reference, but it will probably be the most obvious.


	5. Chapter 5

Goodneighbour. The place was a mess of good intentions mixed with chems and chaos. Nick had found himself here a few times on cases. Many of them ended here too, for better or for worse.

He wasn’t sure if much could beat Kim’s first impression of it. She managed to keep a composed face though, even after self appointed Mayor Hancock repeatedly stabbed the man who’d been trying to extort her.

“Well....that just happened.” Kim quipped as she watched the body fall.

“Sorry for the bad first impression.” Hancock grinned as he walked over, putting the knife away. “Goodneighbours open to everyone. Of the people, for the people as I like to say.”

Nick stood by while Kim asked a few more questions about the place. Hancock seemed pleased but he generally did. His voice only changed slightly when the conversation ended.

“Just remember whose in charge and you’ll fit in just fine.” He smirked again though and waved them off. “Good luck on the case Nick.”

“Never said I was on a case Hancock.”

“And yet you always are.”

Kim glanced over and then back at the body as Hancock walked away.

“Okay between Myrna and this, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen everything.”

“Not even close.” Nick chuckled. “Come on, let’s get you to the Den. Dr. Amari should be there.”

-

She was and while Kim looked around in slight amazement at the place, they made their way down to the basement.

“Here on work I’m guessing?”

Dr. Amari glanced between the two of them.

“You explain Nick.” Kim said after a moment. “I don’t think I’d know how to start.”

So he did, got the expected reaction from the doctor and prompted Kim to open up her white box with the piece of brain inside.

“This....this might just work.” Dr. Amari examined it closely and Nick got a proper look at the piece of tech attached to the piece of brain.

“Hey that looks a bit familiar.”

It turned out there was a good reason for that, as Dr. Amari explained since that he and it were both Institute Tech it wasn’t so surprising. He had to hand it to her, Dr. Amari knew her stuff alright.

He was glad Ellie wasn’t there when he volunteered to let her stick it in his head though. Kim looked at him worried as Dr. Amari began to get things set up.

“Are you sure Nick....what if?” Her arms were folded together and she looked, guilty. As though this hadn’t just been his idea.

He smiled and shrugged, trying to put her at ease. “I’m past my warranty anyway. Just make sure to pull it out if I start cackling like a grizzled old Merc.”

That didn’t seem to work as well as he’d hoped but she did look at him a moment longer with an odd expression then nodded. “Thank you Nick.”

“Alright just take a seat over here Mr. Valentine.” Dr. Amari steered him over to a chair. Well better hope for the best then.

-

It was strange getting a new piece of tech shoved in your brain, but to his annoyance he found he couldn't do anything useful with it.

Dr. Amari however had another idea. One he was less fond of.

“If we hook you both up...”

“Yes, whatever you want, yes.” Kim was on her feet in a minute.

“Are you sure? You didn't even hear what I was going to suggest.”

“I’d let you stick that in my own brain if it meant finding my kid again Doc.”

Dr. Amari rubbed her forehead. “Very well, Mr. Valentine you over here and ...” She faltered. “I just realized I don’t know your name Ms?

“Kim Nguyen. Kim is fine though.”

“Very well Ms. Nguyen. Sit over here.”

He was already in his seat as he watched her take her hat off and ask about her glasses before she sat down.

“Alright now, this is going to be quite strange for the both of you so be careful.”

\--

It certainly was strange. He was technically being used as a host for Kim to view the memories through but all he could see around was darkness. Looking around he could hear Dr. Amari talking to Kim, telling her to follow something. Some faint purple lines started to appear in the darkness and he found himself being brought along for the ride. He could walk around but Kim didn’t appear to see him and he couldn’t go any further then where she was. Hopefully his view of the memories were only fainter because he was the host but he could make out vague scenes and people as they passed through. He found that when the shadow figure that was Kim focused on one of them, it brought it into clearer view for him. Kellogg’s...brain memories, recited a little spiel about whatever she was interacting with.

So they followed the messed up and tragic life of one old merc from memory to memory. When they got to the one with him meeting the Institute though Nick tried hard to focus on the synths in front of them. Luckily Kim had done that as well. They were early models. Very early models. No more then metal skeletons. He watched Kellogg dispatch them quickly and be offered a job before they headed to the next memory.

He knew something wasn’t right when they reached it. He hadn’t been in many vaults, but even with the faded images, he could remember the description from Kim herself.

Shit.

Kim seemed to be watching the group in the front at first, getting the info about them from Kellogg’s memories before they started walking over to the end of the row.

He could see shows of people in the pods, struggling, stuck. When he saw them open a pod he saw her focus on that, and like always everything stopped.

Her shadow just stood there and listened. Only she must not have been listening because before the memory could start up, she focused on it again, and then again.

There was a man in the pod, holding a baby in his arms. Nick wasn’t sure if he should look but he found himself curious so on the third run, he moved over for a better view. The man was also dressed in a vault suit. Probably the same height as Kim, only with paler skin and....burns all over his face, neck and hands. His nose looked broken as well.

Nick took a step back as Kim finally turned away and focused on something else. It was her pod and he saw her as she’d been the day she’d watched her world fall apart. She was in a vault suit as well. Hair covered in ice and she was pounding on the glass window in front of her trying to break it open. She was yelling too, but the pods were either soundproof or the memory wasn’t picking that up.

He stepped away at that and waited near the edge. Kim finally let the memory play and he looked away to give them as much privacy as he could as the results played out.

Dr. Amari to her credit, when her voice appeared again was horrified and apologized for not being able to skip the memory.

Luckily the next one was the last.

-

It also had her kid in it. The boy looked like his mom but he was probably ten years old. Not a baby then. They’d known that had always been a risk what with the cryo but seeing it was something else.

He watched the shadow figure of Kim drop down to try and get a better look at the boy. He meanwhile tried to look around the place for any clues but apparently this memory didn’t have much.

They learned what they needed to though, when eventually Kim let the memory play out and a Courser entered and then left with the boy. Left via teleportation.

Well, that explained a lot.

-

He was snapped back into reality sooner then he’d expected and saw Dr. Amari in front of him. She was probably fuzzier then she was supposed to be but so was most of the world.

“Where’s-” He attempted to say but his voice echoed in a way which made him stop short. That wasn’t right. It almost sounded like...

“Stay there and don’t speak Mr. Valentine. I need to make sure we’ve got every part of that tech out of your head. We don’t want any mnemonic impressions left over.”

A bit spooked by the haze and that echo he let her work. Luckily for him she kept talking as she worked on him.

“Your friend is fine, she’s just out still. I checked her vitals and she should be awake soon. She’s safe in the chair over there.”

He tried to nod but was stopped as Dr. Amari was still working.

-

It took longer then he’d like, but his vision was working again and when Dr. Amari asked him a series of question his voice was back to its natural sound and the echo was gone. He did a self diagnosis just be sure and it revealed he was clear of any influence from the device. The doctor seemed pleased.

“There. For a highly risky procedure you seem to have come out of it quite well. Now go upstairs while I wake your friend up. I don’t need you fussing over her while I’m working.”

“Now Doc.”

“Upstairs, Mr. Valentine.”

He was stubborn but he knew when to fold. “Just, make sure she’s all right. Those were...a heck of a memory blast.”

The woman’s face softened. “Yes, I know. I saw them too. Now go. I’ll send her up as soon as she’s stable.”

Nothing left to do, Nick went upstairs to wait by the door.

-

It took ten more minutes for Kim to make her way up the stairs. She looked exhausted, worn out and like she’d been crying. Reasonable things after all that.

“Nick.” She noticed him though and concern filled her face. “Dr. Amari said you were alright, she wasn’t just saying that to make me feel better was she?”

It took him a moment to get a response to that. After all that and she was still asking about him first. It was rare to see people like that.

“Ah, no. She’s right. I feel fine. But what about you. That couldn’t have been easy.”

She froze then her shoulders dropped. “Oh right, you saw that too. Dr. Amari said all three of us could.”

“Sorry to invade your privacy like that-” Nick started but she interrupted him.

“It’s not your fault Nick, it had to be done. And anyway we have a lead now. That’s all that matters.”

“The Glowing Sea.” He glanced over at her. “I can’t get radiation damage but you...”

“Sadly can. Dr. Amari filled me in. Apparently it’s suit up power armour time, or buy out all the RadAway and rad-x we can find. Or a radiation suit but those are apparently hard to find.” She sighed. “I need to think this over.”

Nick nodded and got up.

“We should go tell Piper.” Kim was saying. “But unless she has any great plans, I think I need to head home for a bit.”

“Home?”

“Sanctuary.” She replied, putting her bag over her shoulder. “I should check up on how they’re doing and....” She shrugged. “Codsworth will be wondering how things have gone. I’ll have to break the news to him.”

“Right.” Delivering bad news, probably the worst part of his job. “Well I’d better check in with Ellie as well. Can’t have her thinking I’ve gotten kidnapped again.”

They walked outside into the Goodneighbour streets. It was a bustling day, and it seemed even more so as Hancock was calling everyone over to give a speech about looking out for each other and keeping an eye out for replacement synths.

-

“So is that a big threat out here then?” Kim looked over at him as the crowd dispersed.

He nodded. “There’s a reason people are so afraid of synths and the Institute out here. Sometimes they take a person and replace them, sometimes they’ll raid a community and kill everyone in it. No one knows why.”

Kim’s grip on her bag tightened “That’s horrible.”

“Yeah.” Nick glanced over at her. “You said you wanted to do some trading right? I think Daisy’s over back in her shop now if you wanted to get rid of some of that gear.”

“Oh...yeah. I’ll be right back.”

Nick nodded and then sat down on a bench as he watched her make her way over to the store. Daisy was a sweetheart, so she was in good hands over there.

He was keeping an eye out for trouble though just the same. Someone had moved the dead body from the street by now but the blood stain was still there. With nothing much to do but wait, he pulled the papers out of his pocket that Piper had given him. View from a Vault, huh.

-

“I think Daisy is one of my new favourite people.” Nick looked up from the papers to see Kim sitting down next to him.

“You wouldn’t be the first to say that.” He replied, glad to see a smile on the woman’s face again. “Sold your stuff?”

“Anything I didn’t need. Like that metal stuff.... Oh hey...” She snatched the papers out of hands.

“Sell your manners as well?” His voice was more amused though.

“Sold them ages ago. Got five caps.” She replied, not looking up as she flipped through them. “Never got a chance to read the article before I left. What do you think? I don’t sound too crazy do I? Saying I’m from the past?”

Nick chuckled. “That’s the most believable part. People’ll think you’re crazy with all this optimism and hope you talk about in there, if anything.”

“That’s cheerful.” She folded the papers back and passed them over. “We should get going. It’s a long walk back to Sanctuary, especially with a stop in Diamond City.”

He paused at that. “You want me to come along?”

Kim looked over. “Well, yeah.....wait.” She suddenly looked worried. “Sorry I shouldn’t have assumed..... If you have another case or something I can go by myself. I did say I needed time to think didn’t I...” She trailed off.

Nick hoped he didn’t sound as flustered as he felt. “No case, just didn’t want to assume either.”

“Oh.” Kim looked relieved and then laughed. “Oh, okay. That’s great then. Yes, I want you to come with me.”

“Well let’s hit the road then.” Nick got up and offered her his non metal hand which she took with a smile, and helped her up.

The first smile started the whole mess, but when she took his hand without pause, wanted him to come with her to see her house and didn’t care that he was a synth. The real mystery was how he hadn’t figured what was happening right there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I snipped off the hearing Kellogg's voice part at the end of the quest. Mostly because it didn't seem to go anywhere in game so I figured why not. AU Dr. Amari fixed that shit.


	6. Chapter 6

They stopped in Diamond City to talk to Piper and then Ellie. Piper said she’d look into leads on a radiation suit for them. She said she’d go with them but three was a crowd and someone had to keep an eye on the town. Later she promised. Nick wasn’t sure what she meant by the first part but was distracted when they got back to his office. Ellie was sorting through files but almost jumped when they came in.

“I’m impressed. Usually when I get a note you’re gone for a week at most.”

They filled her in on the case so far and she dutifully filled in the case files, as ‘someone’ wouldn’t get around to it unless she did.

Kim laughed, while Nick just rolled his eyes.

“So did you think about that partner thing? We still have a vacancy.” Ellie looked over at Kim. “I know you’re still working on finding your son, which is the most important thing. But....”

“Ellie-” Nick shook his head, they’d said after the case and-

“Okay.” Kim replied at the same time. Nick looked over, he must have looked confused because Kim continued talking. “Unless that wasn’t a real job offer?”

“It was...is.” Ellie replied quickly then glared at Nick who had gone silent. However he nodded slowly but with a small smile.

“Would be good to have a partner again...”

“There.” Ellie grinned, as though he’d passed a test. “I’ll add you to the books. Oh there’s a spare hat around here somewhere. Just let me find it.” Sometimes he wondered if he should add her name to the signs, she really ran the place more then he did.

As Ellie went to find a spare detective hat he looked over at Kim. “Ellie’s a peach but don’t think you have to say yes just because she’s-

“Worried about you?” Kim raised an eyebrow. “You _were_ locked away in a vault for three weeks.”

“Well yeah but, that’s....” He trailed off rubbing the back of his neck. “Don’t get me wrong you’re welcome to join our little agency, but only if you want to.”

Kim watched him. “We don’t know how long it’s going to take to find my son. I’m already helping the Minutemen with settlements, and at least this way I’ll get to put some of my law degree to use helping people for a change.”

He was about to ask what she meant by that but Ellie was back and passed over a hat and a trench coat. Kim was thrilled and wore both. The second, over her vault suit.

“We match now.” She grinned as she traded in her postman's hat. He’d asked about that, but apparently it had just been the first hat she found and hadn’t found a new one yet. “Thank you Ellie.”

Kim hugged the woman who was still smiling herself.

Nick shook his head. “It looks like I’m outnumbered now.”

“Exactly.” Ellie replied as she walked back over to her desk. “Now go and find your kid. I’ll keep the office going while you two are gone. Besides, Piper’s said she’d help me if anything happens.”

“Did she now?” Nick looked over at his assistant who’d decided that she was suddenly busy with papers.

“Yes. And don’t you even start with that tone.” Her face was only slightly red but noticeable if you knew her like he did.

Nick chuckled as he opened the door for Kim who was smiling as well, “Alright then Ellie.”

-

He closed the door to the office behind them. “Might have to have a talk with Piper if my hunch is right though.”

Kim rolled her eyes and punched his shoulder lightly. “Give them a break. Piper seems like a sweetheart.”

“You say that now.” He replied, “just wait until you start travelling with her.”

“I’ll have you know I am an excellent judge of character Detective Valentine.” She replied in feigned offended tone. “She’s most likely a very charming young lady.”

“Of course.” He smirked as they walked through the city. “And I’m not-

His quip got cut off however as they passed by one of the city guards.

“Looks like you got yourself a partner Valentine. Should we start the betting pool on how long it’ll take you to go nuts and off her?”

He knew the guards, it paid to in a city like this. This one, less then friendly, not too keen on the town having a synth around and had a big mouth. However before he could say anything, Kim turned to the guard with a smile just short of deadly.

“The partner has ears too you know.”

The guard however just shrugged.

“Your funeral if you hang out with a synth. Don’t say no one ever warned ya’.”

Kim however just looped arms with Nick. “Advice noted, filed and shredded. Now why don’t you actually do your job instead of harassing a hard working member of the city.”

“I will when I see one.” The guard snapped back, making Kim’s grip on Nicks arm tighten almost protectively. However she kept the smile up all the same.

“Oh, I apologize I didn’t recognize you as one of the fellow visually impaired.” She adjusted her glasses with her free hand. “However in your circumstances as it were, it might help if you removed your cranium from your posterior at some point in your contemptible excuse for an existence.”

They moved forward, Kim pulling him by the arm as the man struggled to figure out half of what she said meant. They heard. “Well you too lady.” as they exited the city and Nick had to fight back a laugh. Kim still had her arm around his though so he looked down.

“Not that, that wasn’t funny or anything, but are you sure that’s the sort of thing you should be doing?”

She looked up at him.

“What, insulting people with stupidly big words no one actually uses in real life? I told you I was a lawyer right, that’s half the job.”

That made him smile. “No I meant-”

She shook her head. “I know what you meant and yes. You’re my friend and now you’re also my partner. If someone insults you, I get to insult them back.”

He sighed at that.

“You’re going to make a lot of enemies that way. Just ignore them. They’re just a bunch of scared people.”

“Who insult you even though you help people for a living.”

He shook his head. “You’re new here doll, they’ve got reasons not to trust synths and....”

“And have you ever given them a reason not to trust you? Not synths in general but just you.”

He paused. “Well no, but that’s-”

“Then I don’t care. I’ve only known you a few days and you’ve been nothing but helpful. Not to mention kind. The fact that you’re a synth shouldn’t matter. You’re a good person.”

“I-” He faltered slightly at that. It was heartfelt but she was still only operating with partial knowledge about him. It felt like a lie to accept the praise.

Luckily that was the end of the conversation for her as far as she was concerned. And a few minutes later she let go of his arm to readjust her bag on her shoulder. He was only a synth so he shouldn’t miss the contact but he found all the same, part of him seemed to.

-

The journey to Sanctuary involved a gun fight with some raiders and sneaking past what appeared to be drunk super mutants. Nick didn’t even want to guess what they’d been drinking. Or what it was they were singing about.

Kim refused to stop at any point though and ate as they walked. Eventually they reached the bridge that took them to what appeared to be a growing new settlement with some old prewar buildings being repaired as well.

There were only a few people in the town though. Some of them were farming and another was working at a workbench. Kim waved over the one in what was clearly a minutemen uniform. Preston Garvey it turned out to be. One of the first people she’d met in the wasteland and the reason she wasn’t dead yet as she said.

“Or poor. Since you didn’t realize what caps were.” He replied with a smile and looked over at Nick. He’d gotten over his surprise at seeing a synth quickly and had replied with ‘any friend of the general’, etc. Which was unusual but so was trying to revive the Minutemen with a women fresh out of prewar cryo.

Nick looked around from where he was standing at the town as Kim filled Preston in on her search and also news from a few settlements that she must have been at before she met him. The town was being pulled apart and being put back together it seemed.

That was good, hopefully they’d have a good go of it as well. Far too few settlements lasted long out in the wastes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We all know Ellie is really the boss.


	7. Chapter 7

He spent a little time talking to Preston while Kim went off to find Codsworth. She wanted to break the news to him by herself. Something he’d understood and Preston nodded solemnly before telling her where to find the robot. It was fairly pleasant. He got to hear more about how Preston had met Kim and how she’d saved their lives even with her frankly terrible shooting skills. She’d been helping out a lot more settlements then he’d realized as well. Apparently the woman was a walking good deed.

“And she’s your partner now?” Preston asked, looking him over. That wasn’t new but the way he did so seemed less because of the synth part and more the association with the ‘General’.

He simply nodded, keeping his tone light. “My assistants idea but we were short handed. Besides, she said she wanted to get a chance to use her law degree for something good.”

He wasn’t sure what to expect, friendly man or not. However Preston just grinned and laughed. “Yeah that sounds like the General. Always trying to help people. You guys stay safe, alright?”

Keep her safe more like it, but he could have phrased it like that instead if he wanted to. Preston seemed like a man who would speak his mind as well. In the end he nodded back.

“You too. It’s good to see the Minutemen growing again. Could use more order in this place.”

Apparently that and his connection to the general really was good enough for Preston because the man laughed again and put out his hand to shake.

“I’m glad to hear it. Tell you what. If you hear about any settlements that need help, send us a message and we’ll do the same if we have any cases that need solving.”

Nick looked him over and offered his non metallic hand to shake.

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Great. We’ll have this place cleaned up in no time.”

After that they had fallen into talking about other things, settlements, the brotherhoods entrance and what that meant for the Commonwealth when Kim returned. Codsworth she said was going to need some time alone and was still cleaning the houses down the street, which probably meant he was taking it as bad as she was.

He was pleased when Preston said he and Sturges would check up on the robot later for her. Apparently Codsworth was already liked by many of the residents of the town. Kim smiled at that as well and thanked him.

-

They left Preston, who before leaving had passed on news of a new settlement that could use her help and walked towards the house across from where they’d been standing.

“So....uh this is...was....is my house.” She started a bit awkwardly as she opened the door. “It’s a bit small and well under renovations but I can give you the tour.” She ushered him in ahead of her.

“Kitchen, living room. Still need to clean out the garbage, but the couch is decent at least.” The room was cleanish, though there was a half dismantled tv in the middle of the floor and a toolbox on a counter. The couch had a stack of comics and magazines on it that made him smile.

“Over here, hallway. Former bathroom, former washing room.” She was walking down the hallway and stopped at the end of it. Two doors on either side of her. “Well....Shaun’s room to the right. Guess....guess I can get rid of the crib.”

She looked in and he saw a tidy room that had been set back up by a hopeful mother. Crib was against the wall, small pile of toys and some books were collected on a rug.

She closed the door to that one.

“Closet in front of us and well my room. Though I’ve been using the bunker when I need to sleep until the place gets redone.

He was looking in to see her room was nearly empty. The walls were boarded up and there seemed to be some paint cans around.

“Haven’t picked a colour yet.” She said as she saw his gaze. However what she’d said before that snapped to the front of his mind.

“Wait did you say bunker?” He turned towards her.

“Er...bunker slash root cellar. We had a kid and the world could end any day.” She shrugged. “Couldn’t just sit around and hope to get into a vault. I was surprised it survived looters but apparently Codsworth kept the key safe and no one managed to pick the lock. Here, I’ll show you.”

She turned and Nick followed her, still a bit confused.

“But you did get in a vault.”

“Barely.” Kim scoffed as they walked back into the room that used to hold the washing apparently. “We got signed up the morning the bombs dropped.” She shuddered slightly as she leaned down to pull at a floor rug.

“Ran for it with the sirens blaring with only Shaun and the clothes on our backs....God, I’ll never forget that cloud.” She took a moment to shake herself out of the memory and pulled out a key to unlock a trapdoor. “Doesn't have much, but we tried.” She said as she started down the ladder.

Nick watched her for a moment then followed her down.

-

The cellar was simple, but built by people who were hoping to survive.

“Picked over a lot of stuff we had down here already.” Kim commented as she pushed the door in place after he’d come down.

“Looks like you were really preparing.” Nick replied, looking around. There was one semi large room and two smaller rooms dug out to the side. Shelves for essentials, a bed, another crib. There was even a small couch against a wall with some books piled underneath.

“A lot of us were.” She said as she moved a pile of clothes off the couch and tossed them over to the bed. “Everyone knew the world was going to end, we just didn’t know when. So we all played our roles and acted like everything was fine.”

That brought back a strong memory flash. He could remember Nick Valentine looking at a newspaper with news about the war in China, then crumpling it up and throwing it away. Not worth worrying about wars when there were criminals here who could actually be caught.

“Nick? Nick?”

He jolted back into reality as Kim got up and was looking at him closely. “Are you alright, you got sorta....distant there. It isn’t from the den...” She stopped but he knew what she was talking about.

However he sighed and sat down.

“It’s not that. But I’ve been realizing that there hasn’t been an.... equitable exchange of information going on here. I’ve gotten a look into a lot of your dirty laundry but you still don’t know a heck of a lot about me.”

Kim frowned slightly but still sat down next to him. He wasn’t sure what to make of that, but he pressed on.

“What just happened there. I get these flashes sometimes. Of a man, a detective. Guy by the name of Nick Valentine. Got his brain uploaded onto some files pre-war. Guess the Institute got a hold of them and decided to try and play around with them and one of their empty synths. Which became me.”

He glanced over at Kim who was no longer frowning but watching him. Thankfully she didn’t look scared, but then again she seemed good at hiding emotions. He continued on.

“I don’t have many memories of the Institute. Probably tried to wipe them before they threw me in that trash heap. Just a single room for years. Someone always watching. I’m not really sure what I am, some sort of experiment I guess. Never met another synth like me, somewhere between the second gens and the third gens.

Kim was still watching. “So....you have memories of life pre-war? As a detective?”

“Yeah. The real Nick was a detective back then. Almost asked you a few times if you’d heard the name before, what with you being in law and all that but....” He paused. “Always been a complicated issue with me."

“I can’t say I have.” Kim replied after a moment. “Or at least I don’t remember. I probably would have said something, it’s a unique name after all. I’d have probably brought it up just as conversation.” She paused. “So those flashes. You don’t have any memories of me, do you?”

Her voice seemed quieter at that, not hopeful but almost as wary as he had felt starting the conversation.

“No. But then again, it’s just flashes here and there. Don’t have the guys full memory. Just a lot of it, and his personality, quirks, voice, everything that makes you who you are really.” He tried to shrug, even as what he was saying stung. “Sorry, didn’t mean to turn this into a lecture but besides evening the field, figured you ought to know what exactly you were agreeing to partner up with.”

This time Kim was frowning. “Who.”

He paused. “Who?”

“Who I’m teaming up with. Not what.”

He smiled fondly. This woman was going to, well she was something else. “Sorry doll, you can’t get past that I’m a synth with a personality tacked on. If it wasn’t for the memories then I’d be an empty shell.”

“Without memories all of us would be empty shells.”

He frowned slightly, remembering he was arguing with a lawyer. “They’re not mine though. Not quite the same thing.”

“No, but it’s similar. You have memories of someone else’s life but you’re creating new ones as you go along. Just by that fact you’ve created your own person. And I don’t care what people think about robots or synths here. Codsworth is part of my family, you are my friend and now my partner. That makes you just as important to me as any human.”

Nick fell silent. He could argue more, he’d had many of the same arguments with himself. It never worked though. He knew the truth. He had the mans memories, his life, his quirks. Everything. If you took that away what was he left with? It was something that had haunted him for years. One argument wasn’t going to solve that. He couldn’t blame her though, she was just trying to help. So he tried to lighten the mood with a small smile.

“I’ll take that under advise. So you still want to be partners?”

She held up her hand and he had to admit for a moment he froze, until she started to talk.

“I’ll tell you what. You told me about yourself because you said you’ve seen a lot of my baggage? Well you just saw the last bits before I woke up. It’s not exactly even on my half. I’ll tell you about myself prewar and then you can decide if you still want me as your partner.”

“I don’t see what would stop me from-”

“What do you know about me?” She interrupted. “Post war. Tell me, what am I like?”

He paused, not sure how to start. “Well you’ve got a sense of humour, that’s for sure. You seem like a good person, rare as those are out here.”

“Exactly.”

He watched her. Something was going across her face and he was worried now.

“I.....” She started then stopped again. “Before the war, when I was a kid. I wanted to be a lawyer to help people. But I didn’t realize that’s....that’s not what our laws were for.” She fiddled with her hands. “Nick. I ...I was good lawyer. A very good lawyer. But I wasn’t a good person.”

There was a pause and he noticed she was refusing to look at him.

“I wasn’t......I mean I did my job. I put away criminals but....I put people away who were innocent or fought for harder sentences with people who didn’t deserve it....because that’s what I was told to do.”

“Who told you to?” Nick kept his voice even, just as she was.

“My bosses, the government. Whoever had control over us at the moment...god those stupid ideals I walked in with. Even in law school, they hadn’t beaten it out of me. I got a good job but ...being there, actually dealing with the court system. By the time I realized what I’d have to do....” She trailed off for a moment. “I wanted to help people so I spoke up against what they were doing and it went wrong. Horribly. After that....they threatened to send my family to the camps, that they’d arrest us all for treason. So I shut everything away, I became the perfect lawyer I was supposed to be. I built a mask for myself. And....I....I scared people in court Nick. My co-workers used to make jokes about how I was made of ice, that I had no heart. Hell. I think there was a rumour going around that I carried a whip in court....god knows how that one got started.”

She shook her head. “Ethan was so worried. He kept telling me to quit. That I had to for my own sanity. But I couldn’t, not by then. They’d destroy us. So....we made a plan. To get me out. The way they expected most women to leave their jobs. I...I got pregnant.” At that she smiled dryly. “They gave up on me then. Said I’d lost my edge and let me go without much of anything. But they didn’t send my family away, they knew I’d just quit to become a simple housewife. They didn’t care. As long as they didn’t think I was quitting to stir up trouble. Besides martial law kicked in soon after so they were all out of work as well.”

“So, your son....” Nick wasn’t sure what else to really say so he started with that.

“Just a cover to leave my job.” She looked embarrassed for a moment. “We were never going to have kids. I mean we didn’t really....well we weren’t interested in the sort of thing....that leads to kids.”

“Ah...” He wasn’t sure what to say to that either.

“But we loved each other just as much as any other couple. And we loved our son” Her fierce voice was back. “I punched my sister for implying otherwise, don’t think I won’t....” she trailed off and put her face in her hands. “God, how did this even start. Look. What I wanted to say was. I’m not the person I was prewar. I don’t have to be, nothing will _ever_ make me be that person again. I can help people now and not hurt them. But what people think of me, it’s ignoring my past. They call me a good person because they don’t know what I did, what I was.”

“When were at the fort.” Nick mused as she slowly looked up at him. “You seemed like another person."

“Courtroom face.” She replied after a moment, realizing what he was talking about. “I hadn’t used it since....well since I left. Usually I’m patient enough but I needed that mask to hide behind when I had to go to work and be that person I hated.”

“I see.” He looked at her. He could tell she was worried. He’d told her his own story and rather then leave or see him as less, she’d told him a secret probably few if any others knew. He was a bit lost for words at that. But he knew he couldn’t be for long, she’d take it the wrong way, just like he would have.

“Well....I’m still up for it if you are.”

“Wait...what?” Kim finally looked at him closely.

He smiled. “You said I could decide if I wanted you as a partner. None of that changed my mind.”

“But-”

“But nothing. Doll, I just told you I have a dead man’s memories as the basis of my personality and you didn’t care. I’m a beaten up pile of junk and you still want to work with me. Still treat me like I’m a person.”

“You’re not a pile of junk.”

“And you aren’t a bad person.” Nick ignored the ‘and’ in his mind, but it didn’t matter. This was more important then his hang ups. “I’ve seen bad people, they don’t get out. You realized what you were doing was wrong and you got out once you could safely. If that doesn’t put you with the good ones, then I think all the stuff you’re doing out here certainly does. Preston was telling me about how you stepped in to save them when you could barely fight. The settlements you’ve helped build, the people you’ve rescued. They call you a good person because you’ve become one. What you were in the past doesn’t matter now.”

Kim stared at him for a long moment and then before he realized what was happening he was being hugged.

“Thank you.”

Hugs were rare things, Ellie, sometimes people he rescued gave him hugs but this. He wasn’t sure how, but it felt different. He meanwhile managed to gain control of his motor skills and wrapped his arms around her as well, being careful with his more metal hand.

“Looks like we’re stuck with each other then.”

“I can live with that.” Kim finally laughed.

The hug lasted a bit longer then he was used to, but Kim broke it off and then wiped her eyes under her glasses.

“Well that was an emotional tour.”

“It certainly was. Think you can show me around the rest of your town without any more tears?”

She saw the smile on his face and laughed. “I promise nothing. You’ll have to risk it.”

She got up off the couch and offered him a hand again and he laughed.

“Well I suppose you are worth the risk.”

The smile on her face was brilliant and as she pulled him up from his seat she surprised him again as she leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek.

It was then he realized he was in trouble. But he couldn’t help but continue to smile as she pulled the trapdoor open and climbed back to her house. Whatever, this...emotion, feeling, was he could deal with it later. There was still a lot to do after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Backstory! Yes there is a reason Kim goes out of her way to help everyone she possibly can. Because prewar America sucked and the legal system was worse.
> 
> Emotional baggage for everyone!
> 
> Also I really like the idea of them building a root cellar/bunker just in case. I'm surprised we didn't find more of those in game.


	8. Chapter 8

There was in fact quite a lot to do. After spending the night at Sanctuary. Kim talked to Codsworth a bit more and then invited Nick to help her with the settlement Preston had tipped her off about. Raider problems, they needed help fortifying their settlement before they were attacked. Luckily it wasn’t too far away and they were able to lend a hand. Nick was greeted with fear at first, no outright hostility probably because he was with Kim. But after helping set up a few turrets he actually got a few smiles and saw other people telling the people glaring to knock it off.

The attack was poorly planned by the raiders and with the added defences and help, they were either driven off or killed, looted and buried.

Somehow this lead into Kim delivering a letter, which lead her into fighting off a band of super mutants and onward. Nick went along for the ride. The ride took them quite a few places, from one side of the commonwealth to another. Kim needed to help everyone who she thought she could help it seemed, and in a place like the commonwealth, they were in no short supply.

It made him smile though as he realized he had been right about this woman. They talked and argued as they went. Kim quipping a line back at him before he’d realized he’d even set her up for one.

They worked well together. It was a pleasant revelation.

-

It was almost a two and a half weeks later, time went by quickly when you ran from job to job as Kim did, when they had a seat near a fire and Kim brought up something.

“Have you ever heard of the freedom trail?”

“Why do you ask?” He had of course, knew a few of the members in what it lead to and had lent them a hand from time to time as well.

“I heard people mentioning it in Diamond City, some sort of railroad that fights the Institute.”

“And you figured I’d know about it because....?”

“Because you’re a detective?” She rolled her eyes. “Don’t try and act innocent. You also spend time with Piper and if random people in Diamond City have heard about it, she has.”

Piper had traveled with them for a few days after they’d gone back to Diamond City. Helped out a few people there with paint retrieval and the like and got the local gossip. Fought some super mutants, the usual Diamond City stuff. Kim also got the full experience of travelling with someone who had even more manic energy then she did.

He smiled at that. “Tell you what, I’ll come with you to the start of it and you can see if you can solve it.”

The seemed to excite her. “It’s a puzzle?”

“Now that would be telling.” He tapped the side of his nose.

“Spoilsport.” She scoffed and went back to eating her meal.

\--

He made sure they were well outfitted before he took her to the first point.

“Wait, it’s like the actual freedom trail?” She looked down at the marker in front of the pond. “The before the war, way, way before the war freedom trail?”

“Keep your voice down sweetheart, there’s things here you don’t want to wake up.” He cast another glance over at the swan boat in the pool. “But yeah more or less.”

“Oh, a number.....and a letter.” Kim was looking closely. “Okay, I guess we follow the trail and get the clues. Seems simple enough.”

She looked over at the mess of the landscape and debris that greeted them.

“Or ...maybe not.” She sighed. “Okay, I think I remember where it goes but let’s just follow....what’s left of the red line.”

“Just keep your gun handy.” Nick replied, letting her take the lead. She was the one who was going to have to prove herself to the Railroad. They trusted him with some things on a matter of principle, being a synth and all. Kim however was going to be the new one. She’d have to figure out the code with no help from him. A little fire support on the other hand. Well that was just being polite.

-

The red line lead them through many of the hot spots of the Boston Commons. Almost all of them occupied by people or things who hated visitors as well.

“Super mutants, feral ghouls and raiders.” Kim groaned as they finished another fight. “I’m starting to think this place has it out for me.”

“Welcome to the Commonwealth sweetheart.” Nick chuckled as he smoked against the wall. It had been a fair few fights though. Made up for the lacklustre code he supposed. Well that and the eyes he knew were watching them as they went.

“Only one more stop at least.” She sighed and looked at her pip-boy where she’d been recording all the letters and numbers. “Let’s go.”

He nodded to her to start and she rolled her eyes and set the pace. They were closer then she realized as they reached the entrance to the church in a few minutes and only two super mutants.

“And that’s the last one. I think.” She looked at the church and then over at him. She shrugged and then opened the door.

Nick took a look up at the building, before putting out his cigarette and walking in after her.

The feral ghouls who seemed attracted to the location were there and there was another fire fight.

“At least you’re getting some more practise shooting.” He called out when Kim swore something in a language he wasn’t programmed with. A feral had grabbed her arm and she shot it with her free hand.

“This had better be worth it or I’ll show you some practise.” She yelled back as she shook the now dead arms off.

He just chuckled at that and followed her as she spotted the way down to the crypts.

There were a few more ferals down there as well but they were taken out quickly and soon the two of them were standing in front of a disguised door. Or at least he knew they were. Kim however picked up on the dial and with a grin knelt down to fiddle with it. It took a few minutes and a few accidental presses and restarts but she got it.

“Okay that should be the last....wait the code was railroad? Really?”

He didn’t get a chance to respond as the hidden door started to open up. He put his weapon away and saw Kim follow his lead. He motioned her forward though.

“You’d better not be using me as a meat shield Valentine.” She muttered to him as they walked into the dark. She’d brought that up a few times as he kept insisting she go first as they travelled.

“Wouldn’t think of it doll. But trust me. You’re the main player here.”

He would have said something else, however as they reached the end of the walkway bright lights suddenly switched on.

His eyes got set back to normal faster then a humans and he saw Kim with an arm in front of her face.

“Oh god my eyes.”

“You came a long way to find us stranger. So you can answer my first question. Who the hell are you?”

And there was a familiar voice. Kim seemed to get her vision back and looked forward at the three people standing in front of them, slightly above them with the better vantage point. Two of them were pointing weapons at her. He knew two of the people there, third guy he didn’t recall seeing before but that wasn’t new.

Kim meanwhile held up her hands in a gesture of peace.

“I was looking for the Railroad and I followed the trail here. I don’t mean you any harm.”

The woman in the middle, flanked by the two with weapons spoke up again. “Well you found us, and if that’s true then you have nothing to fear. Who told you how to contact us?”

“I head a rumour about you guys in Diamond City.” Kim replied, hands still up.

“I see. Well I’m Desdemona, I’m the leader of the railroad. You can put your hands down now. And don’t think I can’t see you there too Detective Valentine. Did you help this woman find us?”

Nick shrugged, and walked a bit further into the light. “She asked me about the rumour and I let her take the lead in everything. Figured you’d suspect that I helped her out along the way so I kept her in the dark about knowing you guys.” He glanced over at Kim. “Sorry sweetheart.”

Kim shot him an amused but annoyed look as she lowered her hands. “So that’s why you kept denying you were using me as a meat shield.”

He smirked. “Told you I wasn’t.”

Desdemona sighed while the woman next to her, Glory smirked but stayed silent. “Very well, now answer the first question who are.....”

“Hey, we’re having a party? What gives with my invitation?”

Another man came strolling down the stairs behind the three, Desdemona shot a glare at him.

“Deacon, where have you been? I need intel. Who is this woman?”

Nick held back a smirk as Deacon glanced over at them.

“Oh hey Nick, heard you showed up again.” He turned back to Desdemona. “Uh news flash boss but this lady is kinda a big deal up up there. I mean heck she’s the leader of the Minutemen right now, and believe me, we owe her like a crate of Nuka-Cola for taking out Kellogg.”

“Wait, that was her?” Glory looked impressed, finally breaking out of her silent guard duty stance.

“Yup. Totally dead too, went in and checked for myself after they’d left.”

“How did.....Have you been stalking me?” Kim looked him over.

“Yeah that probably sounded a bit bad there, mostly Kellogg and his location for that one. Honestly the rest of it is pretty well known by most people. I mean the Minutemen are back in their giant castle, that’s big news.”

“So you’re vouching for her?” Desdemona broke back in.

“Yes. Totally.” Deacon grinned. “Trust me, we need this woman in with us.”

Kim glanced over at Nick who nodded in what he hoped was a reassuring way. The Railroad were good people, slightly paranoid, rightfully so in his mind and a bit eccentric. But well, who was he to judge on that front.

“Alright then. Well I won’t ask if you know what synths are. Since Valentine standing next to you answers that question. But what brings you to us?”

Kim fell silent for a moment, Nick could see her working the words out in her head.

“My son. He was kidnapped by Kellogg. They took him to the Institute. He’s only a kid. Maybe ten now.”

“My god. I’m so sorry.” Desdemona’s tone dropped the threat and Nick could swear he saw Glory and the other agent swear under their breathes as well. He could also hear Deacon mutter something a bit louder that sounded like ‘fucking bastards’. Good to see the Railroad still had its compassion.

“I’m chasing some leads but when I heard that you guys were fighting them, I thought maybe I could offer help in return for any information you might have on trying to get him back.”

Desdemona nodded. “I’ll have Deacon see what he can find. I can’t promise you everything we know as we’ve still only just met but we’ll do our best to help you.”

“I understand.” Kim replied and the woman nodded again.

“Now please, answer a question or two. You might know Detective Valentine, but there are many more synths created by the institute that are trapped there. They have thoughts and dreams and they feel like you and me but they’re treated like property. What do you think about that?”

Nick tried to ignore the fact that he felt like he was watching Kim’s reactions too closely. But her answers meant something to him as well. While he was sure he knew what her answers would be, he still watched.

He almost smiled when she frowned and replied as though the answer were obvious. “Yeah, that sounds like slavery.”

“It is. So I have one question for you. The only question that matters. Would you risk your life for your fellow man, even if that man is a synth?”

“Yes? How is that a question? Of course I would. My partner is a synth for crying out loud.”

“Detective, Partner.” Nick filled in as he saw Deacon open his mouth.

“Spoilsport.”

Desdemona however looked pleased.

“That is exactly what we like to hear. Now normally you’d be the sort of person we’d contact, but I’m afraid we don’t have time to train a new agent right now. There are still ways you can contribute though and we’ll do our best to find you information about your boy. Talk to Deacon and he’ll sort you out.” She turned and walked out with Glory and the other agent.

-

Kim seemed to be taking it well all things considered. Deacon however seemed just as cheerful as before.

“Nice seeing you Nick and you, Kim right? Don’t worry you’ll get a cool code name like the rest of us soon enough.”

“I thought I wasn’t going to be able to join.” Kim frowned slightly.

“Yeah, I’ll just come out and say it. The Railroad needs someone like you. Glory, the one with the huge gun back there, and I were talking about it a few days ago. We need to get things going strong around here.”

“And you think I can do that?”

“Well from what I’ve seen you managed to whip the Minutemen back into shape? So uh yeah. Plus you totally called out that synth hater in Diamond City which took some guts.”

Kim paused for a moment and then pointed at him, only slightly less dramatically then at the market. “I knew it! I’ve seen you before, you were the guard with the sunglasses on. You were almost doubled over laughing.”

“That was him?” Nick glanced over at the now chuckling railroad agent, still wearing sunglasses underground, then sighed. “Of course it was. Deacon, aren’t you supposed to be the stealthy one around here?”

“I couldn’t help it. That was hilarious. I’ve been waiting for someone to do that for years.” He shook his head with a smile before continuing. “Hilarity aside though. I have plan, it’s too big for me but with you and hey, Nick if you want to join the party I won’t say no, we can pull this off. And when we do, Des will have to let you join up.”

Kim seemed to think it over for a moment before nodding. “Okay, I’m in. Nick?”

He thought it over for a moment “You sure having a synth along won’t be suspicious?”

“You might have to hang back when we get to a contact, but for this one? We’re good.” Deacon replied. “If she does get in though, there might be some missions that we’d have to cut you out of because of that though....”

“Fair enough.” He respected the honesty, which was rare from the man.

“That doesn’t sound fair.” Kim started but Nick shook his head.

“They’re putting their lives on the line around here for synths. I’m not going to jeopardize that. You get in, and we’ll work something out. Alright?”

She nodded after a moment. “Fine. But I want more answers if I get in.”

“Once you get in.” Deacon replied. “And you’ll get them. Now meet at these coordinates tomorrow and we’ll go from there.


	9. Chapter 9

Kim still wasn’t pleased with the idea of Nick getting left out but he reasoned her down as they made it back to Diamond city.

“Fine. At least I’ll have a new way to help people....what’s that look for.” She looked at him.

“You.” He replied simply as they opened the door to the office. “Talk like that and you wonder why so many people say you’re a good person. It’s because it’s the truth.”

“I...” She trailed off as she looked around the office. “Piper?”

The news reporter was sitting on a desk, apparently hearing them come in because she had a grin on her face.

“Just office sitting.” She replied. “Don’t worry Nick, Nat just convinced Ellie to help her with a project for school. Interview someone who works in the city and I said I’d babysit the place.

“That’s nice of her.” Kim said as she walked over.

“Ellie’s a sweet kid.” Nick replied. “Any news for us Piper?”

She sighed. “Just the usual. Start saving your caps Blue, those suits cost money, and they’re lousy against bullets. Still a no on the power armour?”

“Not unless you want me to have a panic attack halfway there.” Kim replied sitting down on the chair in front of Piper. Nick went over to sit at his own desk and make some notes. He only felt slightly guilty for listening in, but the mention of a panic attack had him concerned.

“Not a fan of small spaces?”

“Not a fan of power armour.” Kim replied. There was a pause. “My husband....Ethan, he was in one that blew up on him in the war. Nearly killed him, but he kept going and managed to save his squad That’s why they sent him home a hero. Covered in burns, couldn’t walk for two months and had nightmares almost every night until ...well until the end. The first and only reason I got in one was to help Preston and the others fight. Think I threw up the moment I got out. It was the last time I got in one too. I could smell burnt flesh the entire time I was in there.”

“Shit...I’m sorry Blue.”

“Yeah well that’s why I’m out for power armour. I’ll take my risks with the rads or whatever else there is out there.”

“Yeah, don’t blame you.”

They fell back into chatting about leads and Nick got back to work for real. That sort of grief reminded him of his, no not his, but the Real Nick Valentine’s. That always made him somber. He’d really have to figure it out one of these days. Maybe he’d give the tapes another listen to when Kim was part of the Railroad.

True it hadn’t happened yet. But he had no doubts it would. If there was anything Kim could do, it was win people over. And besides, there was always Deacon around to make a story sound much better then it actually had.

-

As it turned out Deacon really didn’t have to add much. He did of course but Kim informed Nick she’d stuck with the facts much to the agents disappointment at the time.

They’d gone to the location and found Deacon in his new disguise. Nick had hung back while Kim talked to the tourist and then they slipped in the back way of the old hideout of the railroad.

Gen 1’s and 2’s were there in mass. Though luckily no coursers. Outside Kellogg’s memory Nick had never seen one of them. And he was hoping to keep his luck. There were a lot of dead Railroad members though. Even Deacon was restrained and quieter when they passed them.

“This is why we have all the secrecy” He said at one point but Nick wasn’t sure if he was saying it to them or to himself.

He wasn’t a fan of fighting synths himself. Too much, what if thoughts always went through his head but luckily self preservation always ranked higher then his self doubts.

They found what they were looking for inside a vault that had to be voice activated to get in. The code was on a holotape that Deacon played.

“Shit.” When the door opened Deacon walked over to another corpse. “Tommy Whispers.” Nick and Kim looked away as Deacon looked at the body, he figured she felt intrusive as well.

“Think this is it?” He asks her as she picks up a weird looking Stealth Boy.

“Could be.”

“Yup that’s it.” Deacon appears behind them. “Take it to Des and she’ll have to let you join our club. Oh and here.” He passes Kim an odd gun. “Tommy would want you to have it.”

“I....thanks Deacon.”

“May it serve you as well as....heck better then it did Tommy. Now let’s get out of here.”

There were only a few synths on the way out, though once up the elevator the entrance of the doughnut shop had the minefield and a lot more to deal with. Kim was using her new gun with more ease then she usually did and soon Deacon took his leave of them. With a see you at headquarters before he set off.

Kim watched him go.

“So now....”

“Now we make our way back.” Nick said. “Diamond City, then I think you have a prototype to deliver.”

They walked in silence for a moment before Kim finally responded. “Yeah, guess I do. I’ll tell you about it when I get back. Maybe they’ll have some answers too.”

“I hope so doll. I really hope so.”

\--

When Kim leaves the city by herself the next day he sits in his office. Ellie is at her own desk, radio playing as she makes lists of....well he’s not sure but she’s assured him that her new filing system will make all of their headaches go away, which he takes to mean her own, so he’s not going to pry.

“I still can’t believe you just let her go alone.” Piper meanwhile had decided that their mutual friendship with Kim and whatever it was she had with Ellie meant that she could drop in whenever she wanted. Normally he wouldn’t mind, he liked Piper. He considered them friends even. But he was pretty sure he’d explained himself already, a few times at this point. So when he replied he didn’t even glance over.

“Don’t you have a paper to be running?”

“All news I have is either top secret or not finished cases yet. Cases you just let walk out into the commonwealth.”

“She’s a grown woman, she can take care of herself.” He replied.

“I thought you were partners.”

That gets him to look over at her, with what he hopes is a stern look. “Piper I told you, I can’t help her with this sort of thing. I’d just attract attention to her friends that they can’t afford.”

Piper huffs but looks away. The room is silent save for Ellie’s pen scratching. After a moment Piper speaks up again.

“Sorry Nick, I’m just worried about her. That’s all.”

“I know Piper.” And he did, because part of him was worried as well. They’d walked through a base filled with the bodies of Railroad agents. It wasn’t a safe thing to do out here. He respected the people who did it, but when it was Kim....he worried.

“Guess I’ll just have to keep up the research on my end.” She sighs and then looks over at Ellie. “Which reminds me. Ellie, Nat has some follow up questions. Want to come over tonight. We’ll buy you dinner and everything.”

“Ah...” Ellie looks up from her work. “Oh, well if she has more questions. I don’t mind. Nick?”

“I’ll be fine here Ellie.” He smiles then looked over at Piper with an amused but stern look. “Don’t start keeping her out too late though. When you two make whatever it is you have official, I’m still going to need my assistant.”

“It’s not like that!” Ellie’s face turns red while Piper just laughs.

“You’re seeing things you old bot.”

“Uh-huh.” He turns back to his own work.

“Besides, if I’m taking Ellie out on a date, my little sister is _not_ coming along—hey!”

He has to laugh as he hears Ellie throw what sounds like a balled up piece of paper at the reporter who seems to have dodged poorly.

-

Kim shows up later that night. In truth he wasn’t sure when he’d see her again. Sure he hoped it would be soon, but who knows what the Railroad had in store for her.

“Did you get in?”

“Yup.” She smiled as she sat down on a chair. “Code name and everything. From now on there, I’m Whisper.”

He nods, thinking back to her guns former owner. “Sounds perfect, no one would suspect you since you yell so much.”

She rolls her eyes at that. “Do you want to hear the rest or do you want to start something?”

He leans back in his chair. “Alright, I’m just teasing you. Tell me about your adventure.”

And she does. She tells him about the people she’s met, a few of them who he knows already and how she’s pretty sure everyone there is slightly insane so she’s going to fit right in.

“Glory is my new hero by the way.”

He chuckles at that. “Somehow I’m not surprised. Considering her expression when Deacon said you killed Kellogg. You might be hers too.”

“Nah, she’s too cool for that.” Kim stretches out her arms. “I’ve just realized how much stuff I’ve signed up for. I’ve got to check on that settlement, run an opp with Deacon and probably some other thing I’m forgetting.”

“Doesn’t that pip-boy thing of yours have a list feature?”

“Yes, which is why I’m not looking at it right now.” She sighs. “They didn’t have any information on why the Institute took Shaun or how to get in. The teleportation thing got them excited though. So maybe they’ll have more when I check in later.” She finally looked at her pip-boy. “I’m going to have to start to try and earn some money...caps as well for that suit too.”

“Well if you need help with anything, you know where I’ll be.”

She nods with a smirk. “Good because I’m stealing your bed again for the night.” She gets up and walks past him. “I’ll drop in when I can and if you’re free then I would love the company, partner.”

He likes the way she says that and before he can help himself he replies.

“I’m always free for you darling.”

Kim pauses for a moment then smiles.

“Same here. Goodnight Nick.”

He doesn’t have a real heart but something inside him squeezes in a way he expects one would. The back and forth, the quirk he has of half flirting with the women he meets. That’s a trait that the Real Nick had that he’s never really bothered to try to unlearn. Fits the persona after all.

But since Kim’s shown up, he’s noticed that he’s mostly been doing it towards her. And now....well there’s something, something there. Whether it’s teasing each other, friendship or something he doesn’t have a name for, he’s not sure but it’s there.

It’s something heavy and complicated and he’s half afraid of it already. Maybe this time away from each other will be good for him. Get his thoughts straight.

Somehow he doesn’t think it’s going to be that easy.


	10. Chapter 10

Time flies it seems and every so often Nick finds a grinning Kim at his office door and is practically thrown out by his own assistant as Kim drags him off on one of the adventures he doesn’t need to stay away from. She’s back to wearing her vault suit with random armour on it. She’d rather wear the trench coat she tells him but it’s not the best for stopping bullets. He’s a bit disappointed in a way he shouldn’t be so he just says it makes the most sense.

Meanwhile she’s collecting people for her town now. Preston divides his time between there and the Castle. Piper, comes and goes from Sanctuary, always stopping back in to see Nick, though more likely Ellie he suspects. That’s normal though and he’s been involved in recruiting a few of the odder ones. A chem addicted cage fighter named Cait, joins up after they accidentally wander into a combat arena run by raiders. Kim hires a mercenary at a bar in Goodneighbour, though he suspects its because she feels sorry for him. MacCready makes up for it by being annoying as hell. Which reminds him that Kim has far more patience then anyone in their right mind. Right mind comes under question again as they end up rescuing a radio host who was trying to teach super mutants Shakespeare. They walk away from there with one super mutant called Strong, who thinks far too literally and has decided the Kim is going to help find him a metaphor he thinks is real.

He misses out on the robot that ends up in a synths body though. Her name is Curie, she is polite but fascinated by him in a way that uncomfortably reminds him of the Institute. He even finds Hancock hanging out there a few times, apparently some sort of job gone wrong Kim was involved in, inspired the mayor of Goodneighbour to decide to spend some time on the road. He’s not around as much as the others but it’s still slightly strange seeing him around a place like Sanctuary.

They start to fill up the little town and even normal settlers start to appear in the newly built buildings as well. Piper has a news outpost there and Kim makes sure everyone has some room of their own. She even keeps trying to get him to take some space but when he argues he doesn’t need any for probably the fifth time, she puts a spare bed in her own room and tells him the debate is over and he’s staying with her, in the bunker if he wants, or the couch in the living room if he doesn’t want the bed in her room, but he now has an official place to stay whenever he’s visiting. End of story. He just gives in at that point and has to admit he wasn’t really arguing as much as he could have.

Deacon’s managed to avoid being pinned down yet, but he’s pretty sure Kim will either get him to come around or just start arguing with him until he gives up. It’s hard to run away from Kim’s arguments but he hopes to be there if the man tries.

Through it all Piper gets word of a radiation suit and convinces them to put it on hold for her. Kim just needs the caps. He lets the mercenary, Cait and Piper cover that ground, his work doesn't earn much and gets split three ways.

-

Ellie meanwhile is starting to get annoyed. Which means that things have reached a critical level because Ellie works for him and patience is practically her middle name.

“If you don’t stop playing those tapes and actually ask for help I’m going to do it for you.” She finally says, walking downstairs one night.

He’s startled to say the least and awkwardly tries to apologize or more honestly, to deflect.

“Didn’t mean to wake you up Ellie. Sorry about that.”

“No. Nick.” She sits down next to him. “I’m worried about you. You haven’t been this into those tapes for a while now.”

“I...” It’s true. The....whatever emotion he has whenever Kim is around reminds him of the past, of how he has no real past, that he’s fake. That and a lot of other things that end up with him replaying the tapes.

“Ask her for help.” Ellie says calmly putting her hands on his. “She....you’re important to her. If you ask her for help she’s not going to turn you down.”

He watches her. “She’s got enough to worry about then...”

“Then her partner?” Ellie looks at him. “I’m giving you one chance. The next time she comes by, ask for her help. Or I ask for you.” She pats him on his hand and then stands up. “And stop playing the tapes please. I do want to get some sleep tonight.”

He’s stunned a bit but nods. Smile forming.

“What would I do without you Ellie?”

“I have no idea.” The woman replied with a yawn as she walked up the stairs. “Now get some rest yourself. Read a book, tinker with something, just stare at a wall and ignore your thoughts, anything but those tapes.”

He shakes his head but waits for her to get back into bed. Instead of doing any of that, he pulls out some old files, paper files not the tapes and starts making notes. If he’s going to do this, he’s going to do it right.

\--

He finally asks her the next time she drops by. Ellie excuses herself with an excuse about meeting Piper about something and leaves them alone. Kim sits at her desk and looks over at Nick. He has a feeling that someone told her he wanted to ask her something. He’s just not sure if he should be irritated at Ellie or Piper.

However he does get around to asking.

“You know there’s a chunk of Nick Valentine history I’d been hoping to put a bow on for a while now. I could use a hand if you wanted to help me take a crack at it.”

“Of course Nick.” And her reply is just as quick and positive as he knew it would be, as Ellie told him it would be. But still there’s asking and then there’s telling.

So he starts to talk about Eddie Winters and she listens to him.

“The name sounds familiar.” She says when there’s a pause. “But after my ice nap my memory isn’t as great as it used to be. But I remember a huge fuss when a mob boss got off. What makes you think this guys is alive though?”

“Because the bastard wanted to live forever. I got info that he locked himself away with some crazy radiation technology and....”

“You think he might have became a ghoul?”

“I’m sure of it. He’s also arrogant. He left codes hidden in these tapes scattered around. I’ve found one myself. It’s a way to get into his bunker, I know where it is and if we find the tapes we can hunt this bastard down and kill him before he decides to come out and start his reign of terror on what’s left of this world.”

Kim watches his closely and for a moment he’s sure she’s going to say no. However while her tone is careful, she doesn’t just shoot him down.

“Nick....this sounds personal. I know you said he’s a crime boss but we’ve got raiders and people around who are terrible as well. This kinda sounds like a vendetta.”

And she asks, and this, this is why he didn’t want to ask her for help because of the memories. He sighs.

“It is, at least for the real Valentine. I’ve got memories, of a girl. My girl...well I know they’re not my memories but the girl.” He rubs the back of his neck. “She was beautiful and innocent and she was killed by Winters because she was engaged to the real Nick Valentine who was working his case. So yeah. You could say this is a vendetta. Even if it’s not my own, I can’t shake it.”

“Oh....” She falls quiet then nods. “Let’s find those tapes then.”

“You’re in? Vendetta and all?”

She gave him a wry smile. “Nick you helped me track down and kill Kellogg. Even if they’re just memories that you didn’t live, they’re clearly hurting you. I’ll help you. Besides, he’s a criminal that should have been found guilty by the law years ago. I’m not a judge but I was a prosecutor.”

He got a chuckle out of that. “Verdict recommendation then prosecutor?”

“Guilty, penalty of death due to repeat offences and manipulation of the justice system.”

“Well then, let’s go help justice along.”

\--

They hunt for the tapes. He’s surprised how much time she puts away to help him with this. She says it’s fine and that she’s taking him with her to the glowing sea so this is something they have to work on first anyway. He feels guilty for that, until she tells him to shove it and says Piper is working with Curie and even Hancock to get her stocked up on better RadAway and stimpacks and Med-X now that they have a working radiation suit.

“So it’s not like I can go right now anyway.” She says as she smashes another rad roach with her gun.

“Glad I’m not holding you up.”

“I know. Because you’re a good person.” She’s been keeping that up as well. He wonders if Ellie has been talking to her or if she’s decided she’d had enough with him putting himself down. It could be both.

However he pushes forward, those thoughts can wait.

-

The search take them from one end of the Commonwealth to another as they search police stations and bases. Avoiding, fighting and running from super mutants, ghouls and a deathclaw in one particularly terrifying case.

They manage to hide from it, inside a house squished under a desk. Neither of them saying a word but both holding onto their guns for dear life as the deathclaw finally gets bored and wanders off down the street.

They wait a good fifteen minutes anyway before even talking.

“I think its gone.” Kim whispers.

“I think you might be right. Do you want to go check?”

There’s a pause.

“Not really.”

He sighs because neither does he. Deathclaws, what in gods name happened to create those things. The only thing worse was running into one of those giant super mutants. The behemoths or something.

“Well we’re going to have to move eventually.” They’re squished in. Kim leaning against him, feet underneath her.

“I vote we live here now.”

That got a smile. “And if it comes back?”

Another pause.

“Never mind, but we’re both going to check. Otherwise if it’s there I’m running and you’re taking your chances with it.” She moved carefully to avoid squishing him further as she got out.

“Can’t argue with that.” He replied with a smirk as he pulled himself out and up.

“At least we got another tape, whats that leave? Three?”

“Just three.”

They walked carefully over to the open door and peered out.

“I think it’s gone.” He said carefully.

“Good then let’s get out of here before it comes back.”

-

It did come back.

The fight was not pleasant either. Kim took a dive to get a good angle for a shot that managed to finally knock the creature off balance and from the ground Nick got the final shot in.

“Are we dead?” Kim asked as silence descended on them. She was laying on the ground as Nick got shakily to his feet. He’d taken a sharp fall as well but Kim, Kim had been thrown to the ground at least once by the creature.

“I might have a few screws lose in my arm but I can fix those easily enough.” He let his arm hang down and ignored the annoyance. “What about you?”

“I think I need a stimpack for my leg but after that I should be fine.” He sighed that was a relief.

Moving over he sat down next to her and handed her a stimpack from her bag. Then he got to work on his arm with the screwdriver he always kept with him.

They’d been shaken out of place so it wasn’t a hard fix. Next to him Kim jabbed her leg with the stimpack and sighed. “Okay leg is feeling less like a corpses. God bless whoever invited these things.”

It took a few more moments for her to pick herself up.

“Going to have some bruises on your face there.” Nick said as he saw her

“Yeah. Not surprising.” She looked over at him. “Need any help with that?”

“This?” He looked down as he was tightening the screws. “No, just about done.”

She’d always offered in the past to help with his repairs when he was hurt but he’d always shied away from that. It felt like too much proof that he wasn’t real, having her fix him up. It made no sense but his emotions and thoughts never did around her it seemed.

“Alright, but if your arm comes off you’re going to have to trust me with that screwdriver of yours at some point.”

He winced. “It’s not that I don’t trust ....it’s..” He trailed off, because he didn’t want to talk about not being a person, she would argue, he would argue and they wouldn’t agree.

“I’m joking Nick. I know you trust me.” She got up and held out a hand to help pull himself up when he was finished with the minor repairs.. Once he was up she looked at him and then straightened his tie.

“There. Now let’s go get those tapes.”

This trip really was turning into something altogether surreal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gather all...most of the companions!
> 
> Also dear god deathclaws, I almost let them off the hook but then was like, no. They need to fight a deathclaw at some point.


	11. Chapter 11

The last tape in his hands he looked down and ran all the numbers. He had the code, he knew the location, he...this was for them. The memories that weren’t his but what made him who he was.

However when it came to punching them in, he asked her to do the honours. He was afraid his hands would shake if he did it, revealing how much this was rattling him. Luckily for him she didn’t even ask, just punched the numbers in.

The door opened and he was right.

There was a secure, nice looking bunker and standing staring at the door was....

“Who the fuck are you?”

Eddie Winters, or what was left of him. Kim seemed to notice that he hadn’t said anything so stepped forward into the room with a grin on her face.

“Eddie it’s me! Your old friend Molly McFuckyourself.” Her Irish accent was terrible. Cait would be appalled, however that did snap him out of his daze and he walked in behind her. Eddie was talking by then.

“All this time and the first person to walk through my door is a wise-ass.” He looked her over. “Still at least you’re easy on the eyes. That’s something.”

He could tell Kim was rolling her eyes and if it was anyone else, he would too but this...scum. He was too angry. The bastard kills Nick’s girl and then flirts with his? He barely hears what Eddie says after that.

“Just how the fuck did you get in here though.....no wait don’t tell me the tapes? Are you kidding me? After all this time?” He laughs. “It’s only been what two hundred years? Well not sure what you expected to find, but this is it. Just one guy, ghoul whatever. Surviving and I’m not one for sharing what I’ve got. Those codes were just a joke to prove how dumb the feds were. Turns out, pretty dumb. So why don’t you get the hell out of here.”

“I’m not going anywhere, until I get what I came for.” Nick was done listening to the voice of Eddie Winters, tapes or real life.

Eddie looked over at him then, looking him over in confusion. “Yeah and what’s that.” Winters paused for a moment. “You look a bit familiar but what the hell are you? Some sorta robot or something?” The bastard looked over at Kim. “What, the world get taken over by robots after my radio broke down or something?”

“The name’s Valentine, Nick Valentine. Remember me?”

That got the bastards attention again. “What? The cop Valentine? Is that who you think you are? Sorry pal you ain’t Nick Valentine, you’re just some...machine or something.”

“You killed my fiance Jennifer Lands.” Nick didn’t care what Winters was saying, everything was too far gone now. “There are some crimes even you can’t weasel your way out from.”

Now Eddie just looked amused. “Your fiance, you mean Valentine’s fiance? Pretty girl, a shame what happened to her. But hey, you I mean the real Valentine should have backed off when he had the chance. We warned him.” The ghoul shrugged. “Besides, why the hell do you care about that? Some girl gets whacked 200 years ago and you come into my home looking for what..revenge that ain’t even yours? Christ look at you, you’re not even alive.”

The line comes into his head without even thinking.

“Then I guess I’m in good company.”

He pulled his gun.

-

The fight wasn’t long. The old ghoul was still able to fight back, but the surprise and probably the lack of practise had him down in a few shots.

Nick watched the man he’d hated for years fall to the ground, there was a lack of emotion in him. He felt....he didn’t know what he felt.

“Nick?” Kim’s voice washed over him and he looked over at her. She’d been standing at the door, gun drawn but not fired. She’d let him take the man down himself. He suddenly remembered what she had said about him helping her with Kellogg. At the time, letting her take the man down had just seemed right. She must have thought the same thing for him.

“I...” He started then stopped. “There’s just one thing left, not too far from here, dramatic irony maybe. Wouldn’t mind the company.” He needed the company really, needed her to be there. But he still couldn’t say that yet.

Either she knew, or she was just that good a friend because her reply was simple. “Of course Nick.”

She followed him out, shutting the door behind them, and then they travelled through the tunnels. Out through a speakeasy where some raiders watched them warily but Kim waved them off and said they were just looking for a way out. That got pointed out real quick.

-

They stepped into the daylight and he walked over to a now forgotten spot.

“This spot. More then 200 years ago. One of Eddie’s goons put a bullet in Jenny Land’s back.” He stared at the ground and admitted what he’d been trying to wrap his mind around. “Now Eddie’s as dead as Jenny ....or Nick. And I’m ....I’m at a loss. The last bit of proof that I was anything more then a copy of some cop is gone and.....”

He shook his head.

“The memories I’ve got, they’re.... an inescapable reminder that I’m not the person I think I am. That I’m not a person at all. That I’m just a machine, pretending to be human.”

Kim walked over and put her hand on his shoulder. “Nick, you’re not pretending. You’re just as human as I am. As anyone out here is.”

He glanced away, because of course she’d see it like that. “Nice of you to say but I’m guessing you folks don’t have to deal with someone else’s whole life trapped inside your skulls.” He sighed. “Look I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. I know I’m in Nick’s debt. These memories are what’s kept me alive. Nick was a hell of a cop. A guy with good instincts, and a good heart. I’ve always counted myself lucky I didn’t get loaded up with some ex-con’s memories or someone worse. But it’s thanks to Nick that I pass for human, why I get to live in Diamond City and why other synths are shot on sight.”

“Nick.” She tried to start again but he shook his head.

“No, it’s true. Everything I am I owe to Nick, my speech, my judgment, hell even my name, they’re all his....and I can’t do a thing about it, because without them. I’m just a shell. I’m nothing. I thought...if I could clear up this case then maybe, just maybe I could put at least part of that to rest. Could have my own life.”

“But can’t you?” Kim asked. “You said it yourself, they’re all dead. There is no other Nick anymore..there’s only you.”

“I wish it were that easy. But it’s not.” Nick sighed. “Because I WAS Nick Valentine. I had his memories, his fears and all that poor bastards hope. I remember getting called down to some lab to get neuro-whatever done. Then I wake up in scrap heap and everyone I know, love, are dead and then I realize they were never really mine to begin with.”

He takes a breathe, his thoughts are starting to slide into place now, and he’s just glad Kim is letting him vent it all out.

“Everything I ever was, belonged to Nick. I was hoping that with Winter gone, the last hint of that old world snuffed out...I could finally be free. But....being out here with you, what I finally realized after all this time was that taking down Winter isn’t...wasn’t about Nick or Jenny or even you or me. It was about justice, and doing what’s right. And that act of goodness, that’s ours. All the good we’ve done out here, saving that ghoul kid from his kidnappers, helping communities, everything, that’s ours and ours alone. And even if that’s the only thing I can claim in the world as mine, not Nick’s or the Institute’s but MINE. Then I can die happy.”

He looked over at her.

“And none of it would have happened if it weren’t for you. I...I don’t think I’ll every be able to thank you for that.”

He was about to say something light, try to deflect the somber tone he’d brought on them but Kim had kept her eyes on him the entire time and before he knew it, he was being enveloped in a hug again.

“You idiot.” He blinked as he looked down, there were tears in her eyes and he was suddenly worried but she kept talking. “You bighearted, too good for this world, idiot.”

“I-”

“The only thing that’s yours is the good we do? You can never accuse me of being too good for this place ever again Valentine.” She sniffed but still clung to him. “And you’re wrong. Your friends here, Ellie, me your partner. We’re yours. Not old Nicks, not the Institute's. Yours. Just like you’re ours and that old Nick isn’t.”

“I...” He tried again. Wanted to argue she was wrong but looking down he couldn’t.

“You have us in your life not because of who you were programmed to be like, but because of what you do. And you don’t know what old Nick would have done out here because you reached the cutoff point when the memories were uploaded. People change in places like this, you don’t know how he would have acted, you only have what you do. And what you do is help people.”

She looked him over and leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. “You keep telling me not to sell myself short Nick. But that goes for you too. We’re going back to the office, tell Ellie you’ve finally closed the case. And I’m telling her that if you start up on how you’re not human enough, or not real enough...or anything like that, then she can throw something at you. Or dock your pay or however it is she runs the place.”

“I thought I ran the place.” He attempted then shook his head at the look. “Fine, fine we both know the truth.”

“We do.” She let him go from the hug but still kept his hand in hers. “Now let’s go.”

He had been going to ask if she still wanted to travel together after all that, but he supposed he had his answer. He also had an answer to to something that had been driving him crazy for the past few months and he wasn’t sure how pleased he was with the answer. The emotions he had, they weren’t just admiration or even friendship. He had brushed them aside because...well he was a synth. He wasn’t even one of those fancy models. It made no sense for him to feel like this. But as Kim held his hand, as they walked quietly through the wasteland he had to face up to the truth. He was hopelessly in love with this woman.

It hadn’t been love at first sight, but a slow build up of small moments here and there that finally made him face the facts he’d been trying to avoid. But now that the business with Eddie and Jenny and Rea-old Nick were done. He couldn’t just blame it on false memories leaking out. He just had no idea what to do with the information.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This game needed a hug button. 
> 
> So I added it!
> 
> Also good job Nick, you figured out your emotions.


	12. Chapter 12

They made their way back to Diamond City and true to her word Kim told Ellie about the case being solved and how he was being banned from self-deprecation for the foreseeable future. She didn’t say everything that they’d talked about which was a relief as he didn’t want to burden Ellie with that and also Piper was in the office.

“Good job, the both of you.” Piper smiled. “Blue I got good news. Curie got a better version of the rad-x and RadAway made up, Hancock came through with the med-x and Deacon managed to get your radiation suit some actual defences.”

“Deacon did?” She raised an eyebrow at that.

“Apparently one of his hobbies is sewing, or he just made that up and someone else did it. But anyway, you’re all set to go.”

Kim grinned. “That’s amazing. I can’t thank you guys enough.” She looked over at Nick. “I can go and pick the stuff up and meet you here, if you still want to travel with me.”

He was starting to think he shouldn’t but he had said he would go with her when she’d first gotten the lead all that time ago. He wasn’t going to start letting her down now. Not after everything she’d just done for him.

“Wouldn’t dream of missing it doll.”

The smile was worth it.

“Okay well I’d better get going. The sooner I’m there the sooner I’m back and we get some answers.” She said goodbye to Piper and Ellie and turned towards the door where Nick was still standing.

“I’ll be back soon, and I’m serious about what we talked about okay?”

He nodded at that and after he had, she opened the door with one hand and kissed him on the cheek again before leaving. Closing the door behind her quickly.

-

“Oh my gosh.”

And leaving him with Ellie and Piper. Piper who was suddenly in his face. “How long has this been going on?”

“What?” He looked at her.

“What do you mean, what? Blue kissed you.” She looked over to his assistant. “Ellie, why didn’t you tell me this was going on?”

“There’s not-”

“Because I knew you’d get super excited and scare him off.” Ellie replied at the same time as he attempted to brush it off. “He hasn’t told her yet.”

“Ellie.” Nick started, but she waved at him.

“Have a seat Nick. I promise I won’t let Piper run off and tell Kim.”

Piper sighed but sat down next to Ellie. He glanced at the two of them. Ellie seemed sure of her ability to get Piper to keep a story quiet, which in his mind meant one thing.

“So I take it the two of you are....”

Piper replied first, still a bit testy.

“Dating, yes. I was going to get your permission but you weren’t here so we settled for Takahasi instead. He was thrilled for us by the way. We got free noodles.”

“No we didn’t.” Ellie chuckled. “You bought them and pretended they were free so I couldn’t try and pay for my share.”

He rolled his eyes at Piper but he had to smile. His tone was light when he responded as well, it was something he’d been expecting for a while now. “Good for the two of you.”

“See. I told you.” Ellie pointed a look over to Piper, in regards to what, he didn’t know. “Now tell him you’re not going to tell Kim or he’ll spend the entire night worrying about it.”

“I promise.” She saw the look she received. “I do, swear it on my newspaper. But really, she kissed you. I think she likes you back.”

“She kissed me on the cheek Piper.”

“And?”

“And....people do that to friends?” He didn’t like the way this was going, but he was trapped for the moment.

“Have you ever seen her do that to anyone? Ever?”

He frowned slightly. “Uh no....but.”

“But what?”

He sighed. “Fine, look you’re both right on one part. I....do like her. A lot. Not sure how that’s even possible but there you go.”

“And....”

“And she’s about to go to the Glowing Sea to find info on her missing kid. I’m not dropping that on top of her at a time like this.”

“Well maybe that might help.”

“Or maybe it’ll make everything worse.” Nick replied back, frustration mounting in his voice. “Look, this is easy for you. You know who you are, what you are. I’m....I’m not worth someone like that. And I’m not dropping something like that on her when she’s still trying to find her missing kid.”

There was silence and then a crushed up ball of paper hit him on the side.

“You’re worth more then you think Nick.” Ellie replied quietly. “But we’re not going to force anything, are we Piper.”

The woman looked over at her and then sighed. “Fine. I promised after all. But look, serious here. Please just _think_ about it. I want Blue to be happy and I want you to be happy. Heck I want her kid to be happy whenever we find him. And I think you two could make each other _really_ happy. Honestly the way she smiles whenever you show up, it’s like the rads have cleared and we’ve magically gotten rid of all the raiders in the world.”

He looked at her.

“Fine don’t believe my excellent comparison.” She sighed and rubbed her face before continuing. “Just, take care of yourself okay Nickie? There are people out here who care about you a whole lot more then you care about yourself.

There was a silence and he nodded slightly.

“I’ll....think about. Just I can’t promise anything.”

“Doesn’t matter.” Piper replied. “You two go and fight the Glowing Sea, get her kid back and then figure it all out. But we’ll be here if you want to talk.”

Ellie nodded and he wondered again how he’d managed to get so many people around him like this. People who treated him like a real person, people who would fight against anyone who was cruel to him, even himself.

It was crazy. But it was the way life turned out.

He told the ladies to go out for supper on him and was hugged twice over. When they left, he found a note from Ellie left at his desk on top of the Eddie Winter files.

_‘congrats on solving the case! I’m so happy for you. Just remember, you’re still here. We’ll have plenty of cases in the future and Nick Valentine is more then just some memories. -Ellie’_

He sighed again but smiled and carefully took the note and filled it away with his own private documents he kept to remind himself why he did this. After that he got ready to put a lid on the case for good and let Ellie file it away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but just wrapping up the last of the Winters case. Sadly someone's misguided belief that they're just not good enough will be with us a little while longer. 
> 
> Damn it bethesda this is why we need a hug button.


	13. Chapter 13

In the afternoon of the next day, Kim showed up with a backpack that had a radiation suit inside.

“Got some other supplies as well, Apparently either Deacon or Tinker Tom knows how to make really good backpacks.” She waited for him to gather his stuff. “Normally I’d say Tom but randomly being into sewing would explain how Deacon seems to own half the outfits in the wasteland. Ready?”

He looked her over and then nodded. “Let’s hit the road.”

-

They were going to the edge of the glowing sea where Kim would change into her radiation suit there and continue onward. The trip there was filled with the usual annoyances, super mutants, mirelurks, raiders. But they made their way out until the trees started to look less tree like and more...

“Doom trees.” Kim said as she saw them in the distance. “Well my geiger counter is acting up. Give me a moment.” She pulled her leather armour off her vault suit and pulled out the radiation suit. “I feel like I should be going up in space.” She said as she stepped into the suit, getting Nick to hold the helmet for her.

“Probably less radscorpians up there.”

“Probably. Okay thanks.” She took a rad-x before she fit the helmet on and snapped it into place.

She waved at him, mouth clearly moving, he shook his head.

“I said can you hear me?” The voice was muffled but he nodded. “Okay good.”

She leaned down and stuffed the leather armour in her bag and pulled her pouch of stimpacks, med-x, RadAway, and rad-x on her shoulder. She’d explained that Curie had thought it best for her to have them in an easily reachable place on her trip.

“Let’s go.”

-

The Glowing Sea lived up to its name. It was pure green radiation as far as the eye could see. Cracked doom trees everywhere. Radscorpians were the most annoying things to fight, even if ghouls were the more common.

Somehow they survived them all. Even a deathclaw that they hid from before making their way towards a giant crater.

“Not these kooks.” Nick shook his head but let Kim take the lead. If anyone could survive an encounter with the Atom cult, it was probably her.

Luckily they seemed peaceful enough this time and let them go off, after giving Kim directions to find who they were looking for. Apparently he was living in a small cave.

Well if you were hiding from the Institute it was probably best to go all out.

-

He just didn’t realize how far until they walked into the cave and Kim pulled her helmet off.

“He’s a super mutant?”

“What? Who are you?” Said super mutant in question was wearing a pair of glasses that were tied on his face. Between that, the robot puttering around and the defences Nick was guessing this must be a new thing.

It took a while for Kim to manage to convince him that she wasn’t stalling for time while Kellogg arrived and that she in fact killed him. It took even longer for her to convince him to help her break into the Institute. The man’s name was Virgil and he needed their help to get something back from his labs so he was willing to help them. Especially after Kim told him her reason was that she was trying to find her son.

They just needed one thing first.

“A courser chip.” Virgil said. “I don’t supposed you know much about Coursers?”

“I saw one once, but that’s it.” Kim replied.

“’Hmph, surprised you survived even that. But you’re going to have to do more then see one to get the chip. You’ll have to kill it and take it from inside its head. Get that and the code from it and bring it back to me. I’ll have something drawn up by then.”

He went on to explain a bit more about the teleportation and why they needed the chip but it went mostly over Nicks head. They had a new goal though. And a way to track it down.

-

“Killing a courser, huh?”

It had been raining on their way back through the glowing sea so they hadn’t gotten much of a chance to talk. Once they were out they located the first abandoned building that was empty and somewhat secure looking.

“Yeah.” Kim was thoughtful as she sat on a semi decent couch she had managed to pull right side up. “That’s going to be hard.”

That was putting it lightly, Virgil had even said he didn’t expect her to survive and the stories about them from the Railroad weren’t that encouraging either.

“So when do we start?”

“What?” Kim looked over at him. “Nick, I can’t bring you. What if the courser wins? They’ll drag you back to the Institute or just kill you.”

“They threw me out once before doll, I don’t think they’d want me back.” Nick shrugged. “And if they win, then anyone you bring with you will be dead.”

“Yes but I’m...” She fell silent.

Nick looked at her, suddenly suspicious. “You weren’t thinking of going on your own now were you?”

Kim didn’t look at him.

“Kim....”

“It would be safer.”

“Safer for the Courser you mean.”

“It’s my son. I can’t put my friends at risk like that.” She finally gave up and looked over at him. “I keep having nightmares where you’re all dying or being taken away from me and all I can do is just pound at the glass in front of me.” She rubs under her glasses. “Just hitting the glass and futilely screaming...again”

That gets him to straighten up and he goes over to sit next to her on the couch, trying his best to sound reassuring when really it terrifies him.

“Kim. They’re just dreams. No one’s going to take us away from you. Alright?”

Kim looks down at her hands.

“I had a dream where they realized where you were because of me.” She falls silent for a moment and he’s about to interject when she continues. “Working with the Railroad....I’m helping but I keep hearing so many horror stories. I just....what if I’m putting you in danger, what if they drag you back and wipe your mind? I can’t....I can’t let them do that to you Nick.”

That breaks him and he doesn’t ask what happened to him in her dream. Instead he puts his arm around her and pulls her in closer to him.

“Come here. You’re not putting me in any more danger from those eggheads down there then I do on a regular basis. They’ve got eyes and ears everywhere. If they wanted me back they’d have tried something by now.” He sighs and Kim leans against his side as though this is normal. “Look, everyone you’ve gathered up. They’d all volunteer to go with you in a heartbeat. Even the complainers like Cait or MacCready. You’re a good friend and that’s why people want to help you. Will, help you, whether you want the help or not, so don’t push us away because you’re afraid we’ll get hurt.”

Kim didn’t respond for a while, just sat there, leaning against him. Then after what seemed like forever.

“Fine. I won’t go alone.”

It was a start.

“Can...” Kim started then stopped for a moment. “Do you mind staying like this for a while?”

He wasn’t sure what she meant at first and then he realized she meant sitting there, against him with his arm around her. He paused because it had been a spur of the moment type of thing. Trying to calm her down, not a thought out action. Because he shouldn’t, he really shouldn’t. However he can’t say no to her and just replies lightly.

“If you’re sure you’re comfortable there, I’m good.”

“I am too then.” She replied and let her head drop on his shoulder. He sat there quietly and soon the women was asleep against him. He risked a look over and to check and saw her face, eyes closed, hair tied back but disheveled from the rain, one of her scars visible from above her eyebrow.

She deserved better then him. He wasn’t sure there was anyone around who deserved someone like her, but he was positive he wouldn’t even have made the bottom of the list. He couldn’t tell her how he felt. She was comfortable around him, treated him like a person and told him the truth even when it hurt her to. She was a truly good person and he...

He looked down at her and made sure she was fast asleep before pressing a quick kiss to the top of her head.

“Sleep tight sweetheart.”

It was a simple thing that no one else but he knew about, but he still felt like he shouldn’t have done it. So he just sat there, wondering how in his life he had gotten so lucky and unlucky at the same time. Despite all of his thoughts though, the night was nice and he quickly got used to the weight on his shoulder as Kim slept against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah she was totally planning on going alone. This is why you have friends Kim.


	14. Chapter 14

The next day they made it back to Sanctuary where Kim went to stock up for the fight. Just as he had expected, everyone of her companions present offered to go with her. Even Strong made a comment about helping.

In the end she decided to take Cait, MacCready, Preston and himself. She managed to make Strong feel less left out by pointing out that she was trusting him to look after the town while she was gone. He wasn’t sure what the rest of the town would think about that but then again they’d become weirdly okay with living in a place with a super mutant, robot, ghouls and synths around them. Probably any settlers who didn’t deal well with weird neighbours quickly moved on to a more sane settlement.

It took them some time to get ready and Codsworth fussed over Kim a bit while Curie made sure they all had plenty of improved stimpacks and bandages to go around.

“Christ, it’s like she doesn’t think we know how to survive.” Cait muttered, but took the offered Stimpacks from the woman without question when she was offered.

Dogmeat wasn’t pleased at not being able to go either but Kim assigned him to help Curie which he seemed to understand and kept bringing the synth back anything that seemed useful. She was going to have quite a pile by the time they got back.

Deacon showed up with some better armour for a few of them and some ballistic fibre weave for their other clothing. He even went as far as stealing Nick’s trench coat from him without being caught and later gave it back with a smirk. “Now it can actually protect you and not just make you look like you stepped out of an awesome prewar crime novel.”

“You could have asked.” Nick replied but the took the offered coat. “Thanks though.”

“No problem. Just make sure you come back in one piece; otherwise we’d have to get Tom to put you back together and who knows how that would go. Probably end up trying to give you laser eyes or something.”

“Thanks but no thanks.” He replied dryly but Deacon just smirked. Some people were near impossible to phase.

Deacon himself was dressed in his, totally a normal wastelander here look away, costume and planned to blend into the settlement while they were gone.

“Valuable gossip always pops up when the high stake players are away.” Was the only thing he’d say to Nick when asked about it.

Eventually it was time for the group to head down to the old MIT ruins where they should be able to pick up the coursers signal. Kim and Preston lead the group with MacCready near the rear and Cait and Nick in the middle.

For once MacCready was quieter then usual. Probably afraid but too proud to say anything about it. Cait made up for it by swearing almost every few minutes, though that might have been because Curie had confiscated her stash of psycho that morning, rather then their actual mission. Not that it would stop her, Nick was pretty sure that she had more stashes the others didn’t know about. Someone was going to have to talk to her about that at some point or she was going to get herself killed one of these days. He had a feeling it was going to be Kim, everyone at the settlement put up with each other, some even developed friendships but it was Kim they tended to trust with their secrets before anyone else.

He couldn’t begrudge them that as he did the same thing. Looking ahead he saw Kim moving forward with Preston just a bit behind her. Pre-war lawyer and housewife and now a natural leader of a gang of misfits and outcasts who she treated with nothing but respect and friendship. She was something special alright.

-

“Okay let me try to get the signal.” Kim said as they reached the ruins. She fiddled around with her pip-boy for a while before a beeping noise started up. Experimentally she moved one way and then another, the beeping noise growing fainter and then louder each way she went.

“Well ain’t that going to be fun to follow.” Cait rolled her eyes but at the same time drew out her nail studded baseball bat.

“This way I think.” Kim replied, ignoring the comment and started towards the direction the louder beeping was created at.

The beeping managed to lead them through a raiders stronghold, which the five of them made short work of, and thankfully not much else before they came across a tall building. Greenetech Genetics. Where it sounded like a firefight was underway.

“Shi.....shoot” Nick heard MacCready almost swear as they walked towards the building. “This is a Gunner base”

“Oh of course it fucking is.” Cait actually swore for them all. “Hey Kim, got any plans for fighting off Gunners and one of them fancy robots?”

“I can’t see them helping it, so maybe it’ll be weaker when we get there.” Kim pulled out her small gun. “MacCready, any intel on the Gunners plans when it comes to Coursers?”

The man sighed. “Not much to it. Orders were always get away unless they were near dead, which you know didn’t happen. If they’re staying to fight, there has to be something important up there. Might want to keep an eye out for assaultrons. If they have any here, they’ll be up and running.”

“They’ll most likely have the automated defences up as well.” Preston added as he looked around.

“Well yeah.” MacCready rolled his eyes. “I figured that went without saying.”

“Play nice you guys.” Kim had walked over to the entrance and had finally turned the high pitched and fast beeping noise off. “We’re going in on my call and whatever’s in there remember, priority number one is the courser. We need its head.”

“Of course General.” Preston responded, while Nick merely nodded and Cait and MacCready muttered something that sounded like kiss up and a disparaging remark about gunners respectfully.

They certainly were a diverse bunch.

-

However once they got inside, Nick was pleasantly surprised to find they worked fairly well for a team once they got the first few kinks worked out. MacCready sniped at a distance while Cait moved in with her bat and sometimes her fists if things got too close. Preston, Kim and Nick himself were somewhere in the middle ground. Nick getting put in charge of shutting down turrets at terminals as they came across them as well. Preston’s extra unofficial duty seemed to be to make sure Kim didn’t run ahead too fast or into too many enemies at once. Cait helped with that part too. Mostly by yelling.

“Get out of the way! I can’t hit things if you’re running in the way of me bat!”

“Sorry!” Kim backed off, shooting a Gunner in the knee and then head as she moved out of bat range and back towards the middle.

“Over here General!” Preston alerted her to something and she ran off. Nick shook his head as he turned the more recent turret off and pulled out his own gun again.

“Bloody martyr, going to get herself killed.” Cait was muttering and he had to agree. He knew this was important to Kim but the information wasn’t much use to her or her son if she was dead.

-

They made their way slowly up the building and they could hear the chaos ahead of them. The panicked Gunner in charge was trying to gain control of what was clearly an operation falling apart around him over the intercom.

“They’re running low on men.” MacCready shouted as they started to get closer to the top.

“Are you sure?” Cait yelled back at him as she punched a women in the face. “’Cause it looks the same from here.”

“Pretty sure. All the trouble they’re having up there? Guys are probably running down here to fight us instead.”

“Then that means we just have to get there faster.” Kim replied, shooting a Gunner who was trying to knife her.

“We should be almost there now.” Preston replied as they reached another staircase. An easily avoided traps in the next room and they found a few more Gunners and an elevator.

Kim looked at it thoughtfully. “Think we’ll all fit?”

“Only one way to find out.” Preston replied.

The group of them _just_ managed to fit inside the elevator.

“Hey watch the bat Cait.”

“Watch your damn hands MacCready.”

“At least we didn’t bring Strong.” Nick quipped which Preston chuckled at and closed the door on them.

The elevator moved and soon they were going up.

-

As they got out of the machine in a bit of a lump, everyone untangled themselves.

“Wait.” Kim held up her hand for them to fall silent. “Do you guys hear something.”

They listened. There was no gunfire and in the distance.....

“That’s not a Gunner.” MacCready replied, looking pale.

“Definitely not.” Nick could hear the emotionless tone to the voice from here.

“How do you want to play this General?” Preston looked over at Kim.

“99% chance he’s got a stealth boy in there with him. So, here, Cait, MacCready” She dug in her bag and tossed over two to each of them. “You two are our surprises. Preston, Nick and I will go in as a group of three and attack front on. I’ve got a frag grenade I can throw to start things off. When his stealth boy wears off I want both close and far range to be a surprise. Cait, you’ll have to sneak in while we’re talking but stay away from the blast zone, MacCready, you’ll need a good spot to shoot.”

“Got it boss.”

“Sure thing.”

“Well then. Let’s do this.” Kim reloaded her weapons, the gun she’d taken from Kellogg and retooled into her own weapon and Tommy Whispers old piece. “On my three.”

They nodded and the group broke up.

-

The room the courser was in was a mess. There were two dead Gunners and another begging for his life as he bled out.

“I don’t know the password!”

“You are lying.” There was no emotion in his voice at all. Nick tried not to think of how that could easily be him but it was hard.

However they were soon noticed.

“Are you here for the synth?”

Kim took conversation point as always. “No, didn’t even know there was one in here.”

“Then you must be here for me.”

“I could be here for them.” Kim pointed out the Gunners with the gun in her hand.

“Possibly, but unlikely. They have nothing of value but the synth in their possession.”

“Maybe they killed someone I knew.”

“Then you would have stated that as a fact. What are you here for?”

Kim grinned at that.

“Well before it was just to kill you, but apparently my job got a whole lot more interesting. Now!”

She threw the grenade and the fight broke out.

-

The grenade did catch the courser off guard but it was back in the fight in a moment of seconds. They got some good shots in while it was turning its stealth boy on though. The grenade also killed the remaining Gunner, not that he had been long for this world anyway.

“Look for the shimmers!” Kim called out. Nick had an easier time with that then the others, his eyes scanned the room and took shots to keep the courser moving.

It was evading them but stealth boys wear off and as the coursers did, a moment later he stumbled backwards being hit in the shoulder by a sniper bullet. Almost directly after that he was hit soundly in the side by an invisible but painful baseball bat.

The other three used that to their advantage even as the courser used a stimpack on himself. That left him vulnerable though and Kim managed to get a close shot at his leg in. The courser stumbled again and was shot in the other leg by a sniper blast.

A laser blast hit his arm and now the courser tried to shoot back. Preston was shot in the side but doing so the Courser left himself open and was hit by a now visible bat and then shot by Kim again. His leg flew off and he fell to the ground.

Kim walked up to him and shot him in the chest three times before kicking him.

Nothing happened.

“Okay I think he’s dead.”

There was silence.

“So does anyone know how to get a chip out of his brain?”

There was another pause and a shaky voice came from the sealed up room. “I might....”

Nick looked over and saw a shape of someone standing behind the window.

“I’m trapped in here but I know where the code is. Let me out and I’ll help you.”

“Sounds fishy.” Cait commented, but she was always suspicious. She was also holding her arm where she’d been hit by a laser blast. Nick could see Preston was holding his side from the previous shot. Kim meanwhile seemed to be ignoring a bleeding wound on her cheek. Nick was fine, the coat was better with whatever Deacon had added to it and he’d always been harder to injure.

Kim turned to check them over.

“Cait, go get that arm looked after, Preston you too and see if MacCready needs anything. After that, loot the bodies to see if they have anything good. Nick and I can take care of this.” She turned back to the person in the locked room.

“Where did they put the password?”

“The the toolbox under the stairs there.”

“Got it.”

-

Once opened the synth inside turned out to be a gen 3 who wanted to be called Jenny. She told them about escaping the courser only to be caught by the Gunners. While she was talking she walked over to the Coursers dead body and sat down with some tools.

A few minutes later she pulled out what looked like a small light bulb.

“Here you go. In repayment for getting me out of there and killing that Courser. I don’t need anymore help though. I need to be able to survive in this world by myself.”

Kim nodded, no doubt distracted away from trying to offer more help by the small thing in her hands. “Thank you.”

The woman looked over at Nick and he nodded towards the gunners. “Take some of the gear at least.”

“I was planning on it.” But her voice was less hostile as she noticed Cait and MacCready picking through the loot as well.

Kim by this point had placed the chip carefully away and moved towards the elevator at the top of the stairs. There was a console to activate it and she typed away at it.

“I think that one just goes up doll.” Nick had followed her over and she nodded silently and leaned over to press the up button.

“Let’s see what’s up there.”

There was blood on her face again, a gash from something, debris from the grenade maybe, on her cheek.

“Looks like you might need stitches for that one sweetheart.”

However she didn’t seem to hear him and by that point the others had wandered over.

“Where are we going now?” Cait and MacCready had left the rest of the salvage to the synth as they walked over with Preston to the two by the elevator. Preston was walking with a slight limp and Cait had a hastily made bandage on her arm that didn’t quite hide a nasty burn.

“We’re going up.”

“Great, so then we go up, then down and then down again.” Cait muttered but got in as the elevator door opened.

-

“Christ.” Cait seemed to take her words back as the five of them pulled themselves out of the elevator and onto the roof the building. “Look at that view.”

“It’s...alright.” MacCready replied, but Nick could see the way he was staring wide eyed at the city below them.

“It’s...amazing.” Kim walked forward and after nodding to Preston, Nick followed her carefully as she got dangerously close to the edge.

“Careful there.” Nick said, in what he hoped was a casual voice.

“I’m fine Nick, I just want to see...” She trailed off. “The city’s a ruin, the world is a mess but...then you see stuff like this and it...”

“Makes it a bit better.” He finished and she nodded. He had to agree. They could see the commonwealth spread below them in a view you didn’t see much these days. It almost looked peaceful.

The five of them stood there, taking a break after everything they’d just been through to enjoy the scenery.

-

Eventually though, Kim snapped back into business mode.

“Okay, MacCready, you take Preston and Cait back to Sanctuary. I want Curie to take a look at those injuries.”

“On it boss.” MacCready probably would have saluted if Cait hadn’t been glaring at him so much.

“What about your face?” Preston looked over at Kim who had taken out a bandage to wrap around her still bleeding cheek.

“There’s a doctor where Nick and I are heading. He’ll patch me up. But right now we have to figure out what’s on this chip and I only know one group who might have the resources to do that.”

“Alright, stay safe you two.” Preston nodded and winced slightly as he went to move again.

“You as well.” She shot MacCready a look.

“Don’t worry I’ll get them back in one piece.”

“I’m fine anyway.” Cait replied, ignoring the bandage on her arm. “I’ve had worse.”

Kim frowned. “You said that last time and your arm was broken in two places.”

“Still had worse.”

“Make sure Curie actually gets a chance to look her over.” Kim sighed as she looked at the other two going back.

“I’m right here you know.”

“Which is why I said it. Cait, please. Let them help you, for me alright?”

The normally loud woman fell silent but then crossed her arms. “Fine, but only because I put up with yeah.”

With that, they went back down. Kim wincing slightly as she bumped into the side of the elevator. Nick made a note of that. Cait wasn’t the only one who tried to downplay her injuries.


	15. Chapter 15

They split up outside the building. Preston, Cait and MacCready heading back home while he and Kim set forwards towards the old North Church’s side entrance.

“You alright there?” Nick broke the silence as they walked.

“Fine, just the face. Probably going to need stitches like you said.” She replied.

“Anything else? Saw you wince when we got into that elevator.”

“Just bruises.” Kim replied in a casual tone he knew too well. “It’s nothing.”

“Why don’t we let the doc decide that.”

Kim frowned slightly. “It’s nothing.”

“And now you’re sounding like Cait. Do you need me to play your part this time?”

She looked over at him and sighed. “Okay fine, I’ll get a full check up. But we’re getting the chip there first.”

“Of course.”

-

The Railroad headquarters were a bustle of activity as usual, however once Desdemona realized what exactly they had with them, she fell into leader mode and started to get things done. It was one of the things that Nick appreciated about the driven woman. She knew how to get things done, cared for her people and tried to make sure everyone stayed safe while they were all working what was was close to a never ending suicide mission.

She brought them over to Tinker Tom who was ecstatic at his new toy.

“Now you, report to Dr. Carrington.” Desdemona turned to face Kim. “You might have fought with a team, but I can see your cheek bleeding from under that bandage and you’re too much like Glory so who knows what else you’re trying to hide. By the time you come back Tom will have cracked the code.”

“Oh you know it!” Tom called out as he carefully put the chip in place. “Go get fixed up Whisper. I’ve got this.”

Kim paused but after a look from Nick and another order from Desdemona she walked over to the grumpy Doctor of the operations. Who tended to fuss over his patients when they were actually injured enough to warrant it. Though his bedside manner was more or less the same, everyone knew he cared.

“Sit down and let me take a look at your cheek. ...Yes that’s going to need stitches. Probably leave a scar. You’re starting a collection I see.” He sighed. “Please tell me you and Glory aren’t trying to see who can get the most. I do have other patients to see some days.” He pulled out a syringe of Med-X and talked her through it as he went. At that Nick went to sand off to the side, out of earshot but close enough to keep an eye on the proceedings.

-

“She really took down a courser?” Glory had walked over and was standing next to him.

“Yup. A group of us did but I think she got the last shot in.”

“Bad ass.” The woman grinned. “I owe her another drink for that.” They watched in silence for a moment before Glory spoke up again. “You get hurt at all?”

“Huh, me no.” He looked over. “Why?”

She shrugged. “Figured I’d check. I know we’re harder to hurt and Tom might be a bit nuts but he’s pretty good at fixing up synths at this point. Don’t let Deacon tell you otherwise. Besides you’re pretty much a member of our crazy club anyway, code name or not, so if you ever get really hurt he’ll help patch you up.” She grinned. “Only downside is you’re stuck listening to his ‘theories’. Last time my arm almost came clean off I had to hear about how aliens were secretly behind the last war for hours. Nearly walked off without the damn thing. But he got me up and running again so I suppose that’s worth a few hours of crazy.”

Nick nodded slowly at that. “Thanks Glory, I’ll....keep that in mind.”

“No problem.” She shook her head and looked back over at where Kim was getting a basic physical done. “Man a courser and now a chip. I knew we were going to get somewhere with her but I didn’t think we’d get this far.”

“She’s looking for her son. I don’t think there’s anything she wouldn’t do to get him back.”

“Yeah I get that. But she cares about us too. Synths I mean. You get people here just for revenge that tend to steer clear of the whole synth thing. Just as long as they can get their revenge on the Institute they’re good. But I’ve talked with Whisper. She cares.”

“Yeah, she really does.” His voice felt dry but it was the only thing he could think to say.

“Seems to really like you too. Just as much as you like her I bet.” And now he could hear the amusement in Glory’s voice and he turned to look at her. There was no way she’d heard from Piper or Ellie so....

“What makes you think that.”

Glory rolled her eyes.

“I have eyes. So do you. Try using them once in a while Valentine. Or are you really that bad a detective.”

“I-”

“Don’t worry your secrets safe with me.” She clapped him on the shoulder. “Might want to make a move at some point though. I’m pretty sure she’s going to have half the commonwealth in love with her at this rate.”

With that she walked off to talk to another agent and Nick stood silently watching Kim argue about whether or not she really needed another bandage on her side. He sighed. He wasn’t going to bring it up now, not with the new info they were hopefully going to get but as much as he hated to admit it. Glory brought up a good point. While people had hit on Kim in the past and she always brushed them off, there might be a day in the future where she didn’t. And if he said nothing, he’d have no one to blame but himself.

“Got it!” The room’s ever present buzz fell silent as Tinker Tom’s excited voice rose about the rest. “Whisper we are in!”

Kim managed to free herself from her examination and ran over.

“We’ve got it?”

“Absolutely! Here you go my friend.” He gave over the code data and Kim hugged him.

“Thank you! Thank you so much.”

“Watch the stitches!” Dr. Carrington called out from the background. “They’re still fresh!”

“Go get your stuff done Whisper.” Tom waved her off as she let go.

“Nick you ready?” Kim turned towards him, grin on her face bright as anything despite the new stitches on her cheek.

“Always.”

“Great, because we’re going back to the Glowing Sea.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

And not only because he couldn’t seem to say no to her. He also wasn’t going to let her walk into that dangerous mess of a place again in her current, excited mood. She was likely to get in a fight with a deathclaw if it so much as slowed her down.

-

Her excitement had died down a bit as they walked through the night but they kept going.

“You sure you don’t need to stop?” Nick couldn’t help but ask again as they passed what had once been a gas station.

“I’m sure.” Kim replied. “I can’t sleep, I’m too....something. Excited, afraid, all of the above....so we might as well keep walking.

“Just remember, you’re going to need your energy on your way back as well. And I’m pretty sure the ghouls are still out in force at the sea.”

Kim chuckled. “You worry too much.”

“One of us has to.”

“It’ll be fine Nick.” She fell in pace next to him and they walked like that for a while.

After a little bit Kim spoke up again though. “I managed to look at my new stitches while I was at HQ.”

“Yeah?”

She shrugged in a way that was clearly supposed to be casual. “Just curious. It almost matches up with the one I got from Kellogg. So now I look like I have one long line on my face. See.” She stopped walking and pointed the pip-boy light up at her face. He had to admit it was true. The scar from her forehead down near her nose almost matched up exactly with the one under her eye.

“Does it hurt much?” He found himself asking.

“Nah, just one more for the collection.” She replied. Turning to continue onward. That however reminded him of the one that was generally hidden behind her hair on the side of the face.

“Can I ask where you got the other one?”

“Other one?”

“The scar on the side of your face.” Nick started, then feeling foolish. “Uh...never mind, it’s really none of my business.”

“Huh, no I just didn’t think anyone noticed that one that’s all.” He saw her move her hand under her hair. “Got that one from a fight. Prewar.” She shrugged. “University fight. Someone was implying that my fiance at the time was a traitor. It didn’t end well for anyone but they got broken bones and I got a scar on the side of my face from a knife. My parents were furious. Ethan wasn’t too pleased either.”

Nick frowned slightly. “If you don’t mind my asking why did...”

“Why did they think Ethan was a traitor? It was just after America started annexing Canada. That’s where Ethan’s parents were from and he has...had a lot of family up there. He probably said something that set some people off. I don’t remember all the details. But it ended with with people insulting both of us for a while. Didn’t really end until he joined the army but the fight helped keep it in the background for a while.”

They fell silent for a while. “He only joined the army to keep his family from being deported.” Kim however felt the need to fill in. “It’s one of the reasons I hate armies so much.”

“So you were both trying to protect your families.”

Kim chuckled dryly. “Yeah I suppose we were. Didn’t really help in the long run though. I ended up close to a mental breakdown from being a person I hated so much and he nearly died, off killing people in a war he hated. Then the bombs came down and the world ended and we lost them anyway." She sighed. "And then I lost him too."

“I’m sorry.” Nick wasn’t really sure what else to say.

“Don’t be. It’s....old news now. I’m sorry you didn’t get a chance to meet him though. I think you guys would have got along. You’re both sweethearts trying to pretend you’re not. And I think he’d appreciate how much you’re helping me find Shaun.”

He wasn’t sure what to say to that either. Maybe if he had met the man he would have been able to keep his feelings towards the woman with him as just admiration and friendship, rather then what he had now. He hoped he would have at least. Even old Nick didn’t go after married women. But that was besides the point. It was a what if scenario. She had lost her husband, and trusted him to help her find her son. He needed to focus on that, not his confusing mess of emotions. He finally found a reply to that.

“That... means a lot. And don’t worry, we’ll find your son.”

“I know.” She replied, and before he realized what was happening she reached out and took his hand again.

“Sorry...do you mind?” She must have noticed him stiffen slightly when she’d taken his hand. He coughed slightly, clearing his throat.

“Ah, no. You startled me that’s all. We’re fine.”

“Good, I’m glad.” And even in the dark he could tell she was smiling. The smile Piper had described in such strange comparisons.


	16. Chapter 16

They must have looked an odd pair walking hand in hand towards the glowing sea but Kim only let go when Nick insisted she eat something and then again when she had to change into her radiation suit.

Once in the glowing sea they had to fight their way through the ferals and radscorpians and even a deathclaw this time. Not managing to hide as well as the last time they’d had to fight it. This one was weaker though, having just narrowly won a fight with four radscorpians, so the two of them were able to take it out without any damage.

Once they reached the cave, Kim stood there for a moment before seeming to compose herself and walked in. Nick followed after her, keeping an eye on things just in case. Virgil clearly hadn’t been expecting them to come back. However despite that he had upheld his end of the bargain and had drawn up some plans for intercepting the teleportation signal.

“You’ll need to build this, exactly as it says on here. It’s highly dangerous and ah, just so you know this wasn’t exactly my field of expertise. But it should work.”

“Thank you Virgil.”

“And don’t forget my serum.” The super mutant looked worried. “I’m not sure how long I can last like this. It should be in the FEV labs off the bioscience division.”

“I’ll bring it back to you. I promise.” Kim replied. “I don’t go back on my word.”

“Well...good. I hope you manage to get in then. Good luck.”

-

Before Kim put on her helmet she put the plans safely away.

“We’re taking this straight to Tinker Tom. He’ll know how to build this thing.”

Nick didn’t argue, though he’d glanced at the notes and some of them looked like they’d been drawn in crayon. However Tom was still Tom. If anyone could do it, it was him.

“Fine, but you’re stopping somewhere for a rest before we get there.”

“Nick.”

He shook his head. “I might not need sleep but you do. You have the plans and someone to help build them. Once that gets going I don’t see you slowing down so you should get your rest before that starts.”

Kim sighed and started to put her helmet on. “You know me too well.”

“Happens when you travel with someone this long.” Nick smirked. “Now come on. When I said rest, I don’t mean in the middle of this glowing mess.”

\--

They ended up stopping at a settlement that Kim had helped build. She was welcomed of course and Nick only given a few glares or scared looks. They had a bed she could use and food for her though so he was willing to put up with the looks, if only because Kim seemed to feel obligated to accept their hospitality.

While she slept, he helped out a bit around the settlement, fixing a few things to keep his mind occupied while he waited. Ended up chatting with some of the more friendly settlers about how they’d started as a small group who had heard of a place that was offering a new start. Others had soon joined them. They were doing well out here, they’d just needed a helping hand to get off the ground.

That had been from Kim of course, through the Minutemen but still her. He watched the admiration on their faces as they talked about the General and realized that Glory had been right, at least half of the commonwealth was going to see Kim as a hero. She wouldn’t, but they certainly would. And after awkwardly fielding a question from a nervous man asking if the General had anyone special in her life, he realized what a mess he was in the middle of.

He refused to comment but he was sure it was a question he was going to get more and more as people saw him as less of a threat. Less of a threat towards them as a synth, a monster that is. He doubted any of them would see him as a threat in regards to their feelings towards Kim. He couldn’t really blame them for that though.

It did set him a bit at ease though when the first thing Kim did when she got up was to go and find him, grabbing him by the hand before any of the curious settlers might have asked her their awkward questions themselves.

“You let me sleep too long. Come on we’ve got a long way to go.”

“You needed the sleep.” He replied simply. Acting as though being grabbed and dragged away by the woman was normal. Holding hands was starting to feel normal, in a way he wasn’t sure he should want to get used to.

“I needed a small sleep, not that long. I’m eating on the way, no arguments.”

Nick smiled. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Just make sure you do eat.”

“Codsworth put you up to this didn’t he.” She scowled at him but took the offered food from the settlers without a fuss before they headed off.

\--

However after eating, her mood cooled down and they managed to avoid a few firefights and only get in a tussle with some raiders by the time they reached HQ.

Tom looked over the plans with some skepticism. “Are these in crayon? Who drew this stuff up a kid?.....must have been a big kid...”

“Tom, can you build it?” Kim interrupted.

“Huh? Yeah, of course I can. We’re going to need space though. What about the Mercer outpost, P.A.M’s given that one the okay and it has the room.”

Kim nodded and Tom started to fill her in on what they were going to need to build this thing.

“Okay you get that stuff, bring it up there and we’ll meet you there.” Tom finished, still squinting at the messy plans. “Des can get us set up and we’ll have that baby built in no time.”

“Your hoarding comes in handy.” Nick quipped as Kim grinned. She glanced over at him.

“I told you it would, who throws out stuff that still has usable parts?”

“People who don’t want to lug junk half way across the wasteland for some screws?”

“Hey those screws have saved your hide-”

“Alright, alright.” Tom interrupted. “You two go do your little thing away from here, I’ve got work to do.”

“Thing?” Kim looked over at Nick who just shrugged and wondered whether Glory had told everyone in the Railroad or if things were really that obvious. Well partly obvious, as they seemed to think this wasn’t a one sided issue. Kim’s confusion should prove them wrong at least.

She’d moved on from that though and was already walking towards the side exit. “Alright, let’s go get this started.”

-

Caravans moving things from settlement to settlement helped and it wasn’t long before they had the required parts safe at the Railroads Mercer outpost in the north. Deacon had shown up as well to lend a hand he’d said, though Nick was pretty sure he didn’t like the idea of so many Railroad agents out in the open in one place and was here to make sure there were exit’s ready in case they needed them.

Tom built the more complicated parts of the machine, half the time talking to himself and half the time talking to the machinery. He’d let the rest of the do the easy work. Like setting up the base of the machine and getting the power generators they’d need up and running.

It took a full day and a half with almost no one stopping for breaks unless forced to by Desdemona, with help by Nick when it came to Kim. But they managed to build it.

-

“That looks-” Nick looked at the strange device in front of them.

“Amazing!” Tom grinned. “Oh just wait till we fire this puppy up. They won’t know what hit them.”

“I was going to say something else.” Deacon muttered to Nick. “But let’s just go with positive right now, yeah?”

“Probably for the best.” He didn’t like the look of the machine and it wasn’t even turned on yet. They were throwing Kim into that and hoping for the best?

Kim herself was talking to Desdemona over in a corner, the later woman passed her something that looked like a holotape.

Deacon elbowed him. “Well come on, go say something. She’s going off to the great unknown in a few seconds.

“Right.” He waited till Desdemona turned before walking over to Kim. She looked....excited and terrified at the same time.

“Nick.” Her expression of relief when she saw him almost made him stop.

“You just about ready?” He managed to say and she nodded.

“I can do this. I just have to stay calm and....and if worst comes to worse. I’ll pretend I’m in court.”

He tried not to wince, she’d done it a few times in the past when something had really bothered her but it was always hard to see her stripped of her emotions like that and knowing she was doing it on purpose.

“You’ll do just fine.” And this time he leaned down to hug her. “Come see me at Diamond City when you get back alright. I want to meet this kid of yours.”

“You will. And he’s going to love you. I just know it. It’s impossible not to.”

For a brief moment he almost kissed her then and there but in the end he settled for a quick squeeze and let go with a smile.

“Well, this is it then.”

She nodded and after a quick look at him she walked over and jumped on the teleporter. “Turn it on Tom, I’m going in!”

“Now, that’s what I want to hear!” Tom flicked a switch and everything lit up at once. Deacon moved over to Nick where they were safely out of the way from the sparks coming off of the machine. Kim was safe in the middle but the thing was growing louder and louder.

“Tom?” Deacon yelled over.

“I’m on it, just got to send power here and transfer here and oh you think can hide from me...” Tom was in his own world again as he pressed buttons and switches as fast he talked.

A hose started to come off the machine as a blue light began to fill the middle.

“We’re almost there!” Tom yelled out. “Almost!”

Just as he said that, an overwhelming surge came through and for a moment Kim was there, and then gone.

And then the machine exploded.

-

There was panic after that but they managed to get everything put out and turned off. After which everyone turned to Tinker Tom.

“Well, did she get through?” Desdemona asked before anyone else could.

Tom looked at the scorched remains of the board in front of him. “Uh...”

“Tom. Yes or no?”

“Yes! I mean I think so, I mean she’s got to be there.”

“Tom!” Deacon started forward at the man, fists clenched.

“Look either she’s there now, or she’s not but if she isn't she’d probably be in bits out here. So I think we can safely say that she probably made it.”

“That’s not a good enough answer Tom!”

Nick however was just looking at the wreck in something of a daze. She was there one minute and gone the next. Desdemona walked over to him while Deacon and Tom argued loudly.

“We have to believe she made it, but be prepared for the worst. If you want to come back to headquarters with us you’re more then welcome to. If not, I’ll make sure you’re the first to know if she comes back.”

He nodded numbly. “I’ll....I’ll head back to Diamond City, thanks.”

“Very well.” She stopped for a moment. “Valentine?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry.”

He shook his head as she walked away towards her charges. Yeah, he was sorry too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So fun fact, if you go directly back to the railroad hq after leaving the institute for the first time, they have your codename crossed out on the board as though you were dead.


	17. Chapter 17

He made a short stopover at Sanctuary to tell them Kim had gone to the Institute. He left out the machine exploding. Deacon could come and tell them that part, though he knew the agent wouldn’t. You could lie for a good cause after all and keeping the people at Sanctuary in the dark about the possible fate of their leader seemed a good one for the moment. Maybe later it would come back and bite him but he didn’t care. It helped that they all seemed relieved at the news, especially Codsworth.

Cait and Preston were healing up nicely, Curie taking to following Cait around, much to the woman’s annoyance. They would be up and ready to fight again soon and with MacCready, Strong and even Dogmeat he knew the safety of the town was in good hands. So he stuck with his original plans and went back to Diamond City.

Piper went with him. At first he expected her to ask a lot of questions about what had happened. But after half a day of walking and she hadn’t asked, he brought it up and she simply said she’d get it from Blue when she got back.

“Can’t run half a story Valentine, you know that.” She smiled and he could tell he wasn’t the only one still worried. They all probably were really, just hiding behind optimism because even if they thought she’d made it, and he still had doubts, not getting back was just as much a possibility.

-

Back in Diamond City he went back to his office where Ellie was waiting and filled her in on the news as well. To her he expressed his worry that she might not have made it at all.

Ellie sighed and sat next to him. “Nick, if anyone could make it there and back it’s Kim.”

“Yeah. I know.” He replied however it was hard to shake the mood. “But you know that’s not always how things go.”

-

It became harder as the days passed and still no word came from the Railroad or anyone. He organized case files, probably got in Ellie’s way more then anything but she didn’t say anything. Even solved the mystery of who was stealing clothes from Fallon’s Basement. An upper stands resident down on their luck. They were put in the jail for that as much as Becky Fallon pressed for them to be kicked out of the city.

He didn’t even find much pleasure when on another case he accidentally found evidence that the guard that had yelled and him and Kim all those months ago turned out to be dealing drugs and did get kicked out of town. He just stayed away from that one after passing over the evidence and letting the actual guards take over. He didn’t want to see the guy, not without Kim, he could just guess what the man would yell at him.

A few of the friendlier guards meanwhile occasionally asked about Kim or ‘that partner of yours’ but he just smiled and said she was away on work. Which was true in a way.

-

He also found himself assigned jobs that seemed meant to distract him from his thoughts more then anything. From both Ellie and Piper. The later involved looking after her sister every few nights, which he knew was just a distraction because Piper had left the girl alone for far longer periods of time without any supervision before now.

However it was a distraction at least and he amused himself as he helped Nat compose a letter on why exactly she was too old to warrant a babysitter. Then ended up helping her with her homework, as long as he was there anyway the girl had said, head held high. He almost chuckled a bit at that. In truth he had actually babysat Nat when she was younger and the girls were new to Diamond City. Piper had started her paper early and that left her with few friends to call on when she wanted to follow a lead. Somehow she’d figured Nick the Synth detective was one of the safest people to leave her sister with and it had continued from there until Piper deemed Nat old enough to be home alone.

-

He had to admit, it wasn’t the worst busy work. Which is why a week after Kim had gone he found himself sitting in a room with Nat talking about homework.

“They want you to what?” Nick looked at the sheet of paper he’d been handed.

“Draw a picture of your family.” Nat sighed dramatically as only children can. “Which is dumb. There’s just me and Piper.” She paused. “Does Ellie count too now she’s dating my sister?”

Nick shrugged, this was out of his league. “If you want her to.”

“It would give me more people to draw.” She nodded and took the paper over to the desk.

“Just be ready to have an explanation if you get asked by your teacher.” Nick replied as he leaned back in his chair.

“I always have an explanation.” Nat replied. “Piper says I have ten explanations for everything I do.”

He did chuckle at that. “Good for you. Just make sure you keep to the believable ones.”

She nodded and then went back to her drawing. Piper was due back soon, from whatever it was she was doing that suddenly required someone to watch over her sister. Possibly yelling at the mayor again or tracking down a news story she could actually write about.

That’s why when the door opened downstairs he wasn’t surprised, what he was surprised by was the voice.

“Nick what the he....oh hey kid.” Deacon for some reason was dressed in his wasteland cameo rather then his Diamond City guard uniform. “Right kid in here, no swearing. Anyway, Nick I came all the way out here and you’re not even in your office?”

“Keeping an eye on Pipers sister for her.” Nick replied. “Why, have you-”

“Uh what do you think?” He turned. “Hey kid, Piper going to be back soon, because I need to borrow Detective Valentine for like a while.”

Nat looked thoughtful. “I’m fine by myself, Piper just wanted me to keep an eye on him.”

Nick looked over at her. “And here I thought it was the other way around.”

“She told me the truth after you helped me write that letter.” Nat shrugged. “She said it was a secret though. Sorry.”

He sighed at that, well it wasn’t like he hadn't known. “That’s alright Nat, kinda figured.” He looked over at Deacon. “She’ll be back soon and she does leave Nat alone for longer periods of time then this.”

“I’ll be fine.” Nat replied. “I have her printing press so she has to come back sooner or later.”

Even with sunglasses on, the look Deacon shot Nick was clear enough. Yeah pretty much everyone in their group had their issues.

“Ooookay. Thanks Nat you’re a lifesaver. Tell Piper when she comes back that we’ll be at Sanctuary.”

“Okay. Be careful Detective Valentine.” She waved and then went back to her drawing.

Nick got up slowly before following Deacon outside.

-

“That is one strange kid. Guess she gets it from Piper.”

“Deacon.” Nick interrupted. “What did you want to tell me?”

“Not here, outside.” Deacon replied, looking around them. “Outside, outside.” Nick nodded, and followed him outside the city and a few blocks away. Deacon turned to look at him, fiddling with his sunglasses.

“Okay um, good news or bad news first. Wait, damn that sounded too ominous. Look Kim's back, she’s not hurt but...uh...”

“But what?”

“She’s not talking to anyone.” Deacon said after a moment. “A few days ago she reported back in to Desdemona and PAM. Left again, came back and then went away again. She didn’t say anything to me or Tom or even Glory, just Desdemona and PAM so I tried to track her down. Found her at her house at Sanctuary, only she’s not letting anyone in that cellar she’s got in her house. Not even Codsworth and he refuses to let anyone try to break it open.

“How long?”

“It’s been a day and a half.”

“Damn it...” He trailed off.

“Exactly, Des won’t tell me anything and I can’t talk Whis...Kim out of there. Which is why I came to get you. You know her better then anyone.”

“You said even Codsworth can’t get her to talk though.”

“Yeah but you know how protective she is with him. Look she doesn’t have her kid with her but she was allowed out. Something happened and she won’t talk.”

Deacon was frustrated enough to almost remove his sunglasses but just ended up adjusting them.

“Look...This is the first time I’ve teamed up with someone in like forever and yeah Whisper rocks and I’m lucky she’s there to save my hide all the time but this..... _this_ is why I hate doing it, getting attached is hard and now I _can’t_ fix this. She won’t listen to me and I...I wouldn't either because who knows if I’m just lying to get her to come out.” He fidgeted with the fabric around his neck. “She knows that’s what I do..... You on the other hand she trusts more then anyone out here. She’ll listen to you.”

Nick went silent, a bit surprised. This was probably the most personal honesty he guessed anyone outside Kim had heard from Deacon. However he hadn’t been planning on saying no so he just nodded. “Okay let’s get going.”

Deacon’s shoulders slumped at that. “Oh thank god, I thought I was going to have to knock you out and drag you there myself.” His voice started to return to his normal casual half joking manner as he started walking. “Come on, I know short cuts.”

“So do I.”

“Yeah but I know better ones.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everyone in this group has problems. that's why I love them.


	18. Chapter 18

He did somehow know better shortcuts and they reached Sanctuary Hills in half the time it took them normally. Which meant it was just mid morning as they walked into town. People were farming and others were building, however there was a noticeable huddle outside the main headquarters of the Minutemen opposed Kim’s house.

“Strong break down door!”

“You will do no such thing.” Codsworth was fussing in the middle. “Ms. Kim made it very clear she wished to remain alone.

“Yeah and that was two days ago you lump of metal.” Cait replied, somehow being held back by Curie. “She’s always talking to us about talking out our feelings so how come she’s locked herself away down there then?”

“She is probably just needing time to rest Mademoiselle Cait.” Curie replied, keeping a hold of Cait’s arm. “I am sure she will talk to us when she is ready.”

“Two days of rest, what is she sleepin’ beauty?”

The arguments continued.

Deacon sighed as they walked closer. “See what I mean.”

Nick nodded. “Yeah. And you think she’ll talk to me?”

“Well it’s either you or we pick the lock on the door with Strong here and I’m guessing that won’t make her any more ready to talk. So I’m really hoping, yes.”

“Alright. I’ll head over, you try and calm them down.”

“Right. My favourite thing to do.”

Nick turned to walk towards the house while Deacon attempted to gather everyone’s attention towards himself.

-

As he entered the house, Nick looked around. He was a detective after all and he noticed evidence of things being...thrown. Not a good sign. He walked through the house, the doors to all the rooms were shut and taking a minute to compose himself he opened the one with the trapdoor inside.

Closing it behind him he knelt down and knocked.

No answer. He knocked again. Still nothing. He sighed and attempted to call down. Hopefully the door wasn’t soundproof.

“Kim? It’s Nick. Are you down there?”

He knocked again before he heard a response.

“Nick?”

It was Kim alright.

“Yeah, it’s me doll. Mind if I come down?...Gotta few people worried about you up here.”

There was a pause.

“I don’t... want to talk.” Her voice was strained and he had the uncomfortable feeling that she’d been crying.

“That’s alright. I can talk or we can just sit there, but it would help people know that you’re alright if I could just come down for a bit and see you.”

Another long silence and for a moment he wasn’t sure if she was going to answer him. However...

“Fine. But just you.”

Nick moved out of the way and the trapdoor unlocked and then opened. He took a moment to let her move and then went down to where she’d been hiding. He stepped off the ladder and quicker then he figured she could move Kim was up and had locked the door again.

“There.” Her voice was rough and once she stepped down and stood in the middle of the room he knew she’d been crying. Her eyes under her glasses were red and there were tear streaks on her cheeks. She was dressed in a vault suit as usual but there were red marks on her hands and her long hair was a mess. She was looking at him with a look of anger and grief and something he wasn’t sure he could understand.

There was silence for a long time and he looked around. The crib by the bed was broken into pieces, possibly the source of the marks on her hands. And there were other things that had clearly been thrown at the wall or ripped apart.

She saw him looking.

“Go on, tell me I’m a mess, this place is a mess. That I’ve let everyone down.” Her rough voice was near tears and he just looked over at her in surprise. Was that what she thought he was here for?

She stared back. Her expression so foreign to her normally happy or composed face that it was hard to tell it was her.

“Well? Not even a comment about the state of the place? No quip, nothing? Have I finally stumped the great Nick Valentine?”

Tears were coming down her face then and he sighed and walked forward. “What happened?”

“What happened?” She moved backwards, away from him and that hurt more then anything so he stopped moving. She continued to move backwards instead and sat down on the couch, legs curled up under her.

“Yes, what happened. I want to help.”

“Of course you do.” Kim replied numbly, staring at her hand. She didn’t say anything else.

“Kim....please.” He couldn’t keep the desperation from his voice at this point. “Talk to me.”

There was a long pause and Kim still didn’t look at him.

“Kim, you’re scaring me.”

There was another long pause but this time Kim finally spoke.

-

“You’ll hate me.” When she spoke her voice was quiet and fearful.

He stared at her trying to think of what she could have done that would make her think that. Join the Brotherhood? Decided that she’d been wrong and that synths were just property? No, none of those things would make sense because this was Kim. Kim who had told him that he was a better person then anyone she knew. Who said that he wasn’t just his memories, who’d treated him like a real person more then anyone ever had. Who.....he’d fallen in love with.

He sighed and just told the truth.

“Sweetheart, I swear I could never hate you. No matter what."

He saw her wince at that and he hated seeing it but after another moment of silence she started to talk.

“I....I found my son.”

He blinked. “That’s-”

“Wait till I’m finished.” She sighed and finally looked over at him. She looked numb, the light almost gone from her eyes. “I found him, but he wasn’t ten, he was sixty. He’s an old man Nick. I missed it all. I thought I just missed his first things, first words, first steps but....no. I missed it all.”

He didn’t know what to say, so he just asked...“So you were in cryo....”

“For sixty years, not ten.” She chuckled a dark laugh. “But, that’s not even the best part. He’s not being held prisoner there at all! He grew up there, he’s proud of that place, he leads them now. They call him ‘Father’.”

“Christ Kim...I’m-”

She shook her head and just continued. “All of the new gen 3 synths, they’re based on his DNA. That’s why they took him as a baby, why I was the backup. So it’s partially my DNA too. I’m probably a grandmother a thousand times over by now. In fact that courser I shot to get there.....” She put her face in her hands. “Not that he thinks of them as people. Do you know what the first thing I saw when I came to that place was?”

Nick could only shake his head before realizing that she couldn’t see him and asked softly. “What was it?”

“I saw....I saw Shaun, the boy from the memory. He looked just like me, he had Ethan’s eyes and he was in a locked room. I...I tried to talk to him, to get him out but he...he just started to yell. He had no idea who I was. He was so scared.....and was calling for Father. ‘Father, father come and save him from the scary lady trying to steal him away’. And...and when ‘Father’ came in, he didn’t calm him down, or reassure him or anything. He just...turned him off with a sentence. Like he was nothing. An experiment to see what reaction the child would have to suddenly meeting me like that. And my reaction to him probably. It was an experiment....he made that child terrified and got my hopes up for a damn experiment!”

She looked up at him again. Tears streaming from her eyes now. “Nick. My son. My son is the one whose been doing all of this. I got the serum for Virgil and brought it to him. But I saw the labs. They’re the ones creating and letting out super mutants. He’s responsible for that as well. And all that death and murder. All the kidnapping and wiping out settlements. It’s all my son. And...and I had to hide it all away. I had to act like I was happy to see him, like I loved this... _thing_ that my son had become. And he was happy to see me. Despite everything he does, he wants to me stay and live down there with him because I’m his ‘mother’ and he ‘loves’ me. He was so proud of everything he showed me.....and I just....god I could barely keep up this new mask. I wanted to punch him, I wanted to punch my own son.”

Kim wiped her eyes again. “I was allowed to look around wherever I wanted, half the people there were overjoyed to see me because they all worship ‘Father’. It’s like a cult down there. And the synths....half of them thanked me for their existence. But if you paid attention, I saw people treating them like objects to be used and mind wiped and used again and that was normal.”

The fight seemed to go out of her voice at that. “I made contact with the person helping synths escape. He’s just a teenager, only started doing it just to see if he could. God, even the decent ones just play with peoples lives for fun... but at least now he seems to think he’s doing it for something good. So I shouldn’t be too hard on him. It’s just....” She shook her head. “So now I’m an undercover agent. I have to go back and smile and pretend that...thing is my son. That I believe in what they’re doing. That I don’t think they’re all monsters.”

She sniffed and looked away. “We should have died in the bombs. All three of us. Then none of this would have happened.”

“Kim.” Nick spoke up after it seemed like she was finished. “This isn’t your fault.”

“How isn’t it my fault Nick?” She finally looked over at him with some emotion in her eyes even if it was anger. “He’s my son. I gave birth to him. If we hadn’t made it that day....”

“Then they would have found some other kid in a vault and brainwashed them like they did your kid.” Nick replied, voice firm. “You didn’t raise him, you didn’t get a chance to. They stole him away from you before you were able to teach him anything. He was a blank slate and they filled it with their twisted ideals. That’s not your fault.”

He slowly moved closer and when she didn’t move away he sat down next to her on the couch. “And if you didn’t survive the bombs, what would have happened to all of us here?” His voice was quieter now.

“What?” She looked over at him.

“If you never woke up here? Well, the Minutemen wouldn’t exist, Preston and his group would be dead. Cait would still be fighting for raiders and probably worse off, Strong would be dead, the Gunners would have likely got MacCready by now. Codsworth would be alone forever, Curie would be locked up in some old vault as a Miss Nanny, where that kid would have probably died without the antidote you brought him. And as for me, I’d either be dead or still locked away in some old vault as the mobs chew toy. Not to mention all the settlements you’ve helped build. People you’ve brought hope to. You’ve done a lot of good out there, if you never arrived here then all of that good never would have happened. And I’m pretty sure I could keep going for another hour at least since you seem to make it your goal to help out every person you meet.”

She sniffed and shook her head. “I suppose. I just..”

“I don’t blame you for feeling angry or sad or scared or anything, heck I don’t even know what I’d feel like if I were you right now. But don’t shut us out. No one is going to blame you and if anyone does, then there’ll be a lineup half the Commonwealth long of people ready to punch their lights out for saying so.”

“No there wouldn’t.” Kim tried to scoff but failed slightly as her voice still didn’t seem to want to get that light yet.

“Really? You don’t think if someone said anything bad about you that you wouldn’t have Cait, Strong or Piper....hell, any of us after them?” He shook his head. “You really don’t get how much you mean to us do you? You know how I got here from Diamond city so quick? Deacon showed up on my doorstep in a fuss, wearing the wrong disguise for the place, saying that he couldn’t talk you out of your hiding place and he didn’t blame you because everyone knows he lies about everything. I heard more honesty from his mouth last night then I have in years of knowing him. Strong’s out there trying to convince people to let him smash the door instead of just doing it, while Codsworth argues with him about giving you your space. Meanwhile Curie of all people is physically holding Cait back from trying to do the same with her own fists. And that’s just some of them. I didn’t get too see what the rest were arguing to do but they’re all out there.”

He took a breath. “No ones going to blame you for what your kidnapped and brainwashed son did. It’s not like you came back hating synths right? You’re talking to me after all.”

“Of course I don’t hate synths and you...” She trailed off. “I could never hate you Nick.”

“And like I said earlier, I could never hate you either. Nothing you said made me change my mind. You’re still my partner. And I’d say you don’t have to go undercover and do this to yourself but I know you too well, you’re going to do it anyway so I’ll say this instead. No matter what you pretend to be while you’re there, it won’t change anything between us, alright?”

“Nick.”

She stared at him for a long moment and he wasn’t sure what she was looking for but she must have found it because a smile, a small one but a smile showed up on her face. There was light back in her eyes again, if only a little.

“Thank you.”

He smiled as well. Relief coursing through him. “Just glad to have you back sweetheart. Now do you feel like coming out, or should I just tell the folks upstairs you’ll be up soon.”

“I’ll go up now, I don’t want to worry them anymore then I already have.”

“And that is why no one could hate you. Don’t let them pressure you into talking if you don’t want to though. They’re all worried but they’re worried about you.” Even in their own weird ways, if you took into account Strong and Cait.

He got a laugh from that and he felt like everything was worth it. “I will. Let’s go then.”

\--

Once outside Kim was nearly crushed by her group of worried companions. However she managed to space them out and promised to come back and talk to them alone, and that for now she was alright and sorry for making them worry.

“Sorry?” Cait near rolled her eyes. “Of course, you’re all upset down there and you’re worried about us, worrying about you. We’ll be calling you Saint Kim if you keep this up.”

However the promise with a talk from Kim broke up most of the group save for Codsworth who was still fussing over her and Curie and Nick. The first looking over Kim’s hands to make sure there was nothing broken and the second, well he was just there because he didn’t think he could leave her side yet.

Seeing her like that had been terrifying. The news she had brought back with her had nearly broken her and he never wanted to see her like that again. He wanted to stay and make sure nothing hurt her ever again either.

However he did eventually have to leave her side as she pulled Codsworth aside to talk to him alone. Nick took that as his cue to go for a walk around the town just for a change of pace.

-

“I told you, you were the right person for the job.” Deacon had snuck up next to him as he walked. “Don’t worry, I won’t ask what you talked about. Whisper said she’ll talk to us all later so I’m good. I just wanted to say thanks.”

Nick just nodded.

“.....and I’m guessing it’s too late to ask you not to mention to her how....uh not myself I was?”

That got a chuckle from Nick. “Sorry, should have mentioned that part before I was told to go down and talk to her about how everyone needed her back.”

Deacon sighed. “Ah well, it was going to come up sooner or later.” He shrugged, then clapped Nick on the back. “Come on I’ve got an idea to cheer her up while we wait for her to get her conversations out of the way.”

“Do you now?”

“Yup, and trust me, she’ll love it.”

“You say things like that and I start to worry.”

“That’s because you’ve been spending too much time with Glory my friend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because that intro to the institute wasn't horrifically traumatizing for her at all!


	19. Chapter 19

It was three days after Kim came out of the bunker and things at Sanctuary were more or less returning to normal. She’d talked to everyone individually and he could see the strength and confidence returning to her as each person came out of the talk reassuring her that no they didn’t hate her and in some cases, please let them hurt whoever had caused her harm. Strong and Cait had been spotted hashing out ideas that had the others backing away slowly from them and possibly hiding the knives in the settlement.

Kim meanwhile had also managed to drag Deacon away for a very private talk that the agent had returned from oddly quiet about as he went back to work with Nick on their project. He didn’t talk about it, wouldn’t even lie about it so Nick kept his questions to himself. Codsworth had cleaned up the house and cellar, despite Kim’s protests and the woman was currently looking better then she had before. Curie had bandaged up some of the worse cuts on her hands and while she had cut her hair much, much shorter then what she had let it grow out to, it looked like hair again.

Nick was aware he was thinking about all of this because he was trying to put off what he was about to do. Deacon had the idea but the agent suddenly had to report back to HQ in a way that made Nick fairly certain he’d been set up. Not in a malicious way at least. Just in an annoying, you can just tell people things ahead of time you know Deacon, sort of way.

-

Anyway around noon he managed to find Kim out in the backyard repairing a fence. She smiled when she saw him and waved him over. If there was one thing he could say about her it was that she bounced back fast. He supposed she had to, they all did out here.

“Nick there you are, I’ve been wondering where you’ve been.”

“Sorry, Deacon had a project he needed some help with.”

“Of course.” She got up from the ground and walked over. “What was it? Or is this one of his secret projects that only the select few may know about.”

Awkwardness aside, Nick had to chuckle at that.“No, nothing like that. It’s just uh this.” He handed her over what they’d been working on. It was wrapped up in paper. He rubbed the back of his neck as she took it from him. “Well....uh the wrapping was his idea too. I’m not really sure why but...”

Kim looked at it, then back at him. Her smile grew again and he wondered how, no matter how many times he saw it, it always made him feel something, as though the entire world were contained in just one person’s smile.

“A real present, wrapping and everything.” She wiped her hands on her vault suit and pulled him over to stand in the shade. “That’s really sweet of you guys.”

He watched her open it, not really sure what sort of reaction she was going to have once she opened it.

“My....detective trench coat?” She squinted at it through her glasses.

“And hat. I think that should be in there too.” Nick replied quickly, knowing he must sound a bit flustered. “Deacon got the idea of fixing it up like he did with mine. That way you can wear it in fights if you want.”

“And you helped?”

“He seemed to think I’d know if it was a good idea and I helped with the hat and some of the rest since he said he needed help with....” He was distracted now because Kim had the hat on her head now and was putting on the coat over her vault suit.

“And now we match again.” She beamed. “I missed wearing this thing. Hard to tell we’re partners when I’m always running around in a vault suit with random bits of armour stuck on.”

-

She looked at him and for a moment he wondered what she saw, because her smile was still present but she seemed like she’d made her mind up about something.

Wrapping the paper up carefully and placing it on a table she turned to look at him.

“Nick, we’re friends right?”

Now that had come out of nowhere. He frowned slightly. “I would hope so.”

“Don’t look at me like that, I don’t mean it in a bad way.” She waved at him. “But just....if I did something stupid and reckless, and say you didn’t....like it. We’d still be friends...right?”

He wondered if she was still worried from their previous talk. Because she was looking less and less certain. “If this is about the Institute, I told you, we’ll be fine.”

“That’s not what I...” She sighed however and then shrugged. “You know what, we’ll figure that part out later.”

And before he knew what was happening, she put her hands on his shoulders and pulled him down to kiss him. He was too startled at first to respond but before she started to let go he wrapped his arms around her, being careful with the metal hand and kissed her back.

She at least knew what she was doing, he just had half memories of a former mans life. But it was somehow enough and when they came untangled he saw the expression on her face and realized Piper had been right with her comparisons. She smiled as though everything was right in the world. As though the radiation was gone and raiders everywhere had just vanished into thin air. He couldn’t help but smile in return.

“So, was that alright?” She asked as the silence continued, suddenly seeming nervous and he chuckled awkwardly, realizing he’d been caught up just looking at her.

“More then alright. You just got me by surprise again that’s all.”

“Well next time I’ll give you advanced warning.” She reached over and carefully held his hands. Looking down he saw how different they looked. Her skin gently entwined with the pieces of metal and plastic that made up his own. He felt his inside wrench and knew what he had to say. Had to ask.

-

“Kim....” He started, knowing she wasn’t going to like it.

“Don’t.” She replied, because of course she knew. “I don’t c-”

He shook his head. “No, just...let me. I need to be certain. I’ve always let doubts build up on me, I don’t....I don’t want this to go wrong. Please....”

She sighed but kissed him on the cheek and then leaned back down letting go of his hands to fold her arms. “Ask me anything Nick but I’m going to answer honestly. Not just how you think I should answer.”

He nodded before taking a breath.“Are...are you sure this is what you want?” He looked down at her. “I know you don’t like it when I...beat myself up but the facts are there. I’m an old bot, half my memories come from someone else’s life and I’m not exactly what you’d call easy on the eyes. There’s plenty of people out there that would be better for you.” He tried to play it down with a smile but she shook her head firmly.

“Maybe but I’m not in love with any of them. Besides, half of my memories come from before anyone else here was born and they might not be a different person’s but at times it really feels like they are, everything is so different here, everything is just....I don’t know realer.” She waved a hand as though fed up with that thought. “Anyway, I don’t know what you’re talking about, not being easy on the eyes. I mean have you looked at yourself?”

“Er....yes?” He was officially confused. “I’ve got holes on my face and neck sweetheart, with metal sticking out-”

“Your eyes glow yellow.” She interrupted him with a solemn voice and moved forward, taking both of his hands carefully in hers again. “They’re the most beautiful things I’ve seen in this place. Every time I see them in the dark I know you’re there and I feel safer. And you smile so easily, even in a world like this. It makes me feel lighter just seeing it. I don’t care that you’re missing patches of skin. Haven’t you noticed my own face is growing into a patchwork quilt of scars?”

He’s a bit stunned by the eyes comment but he managed to protest. “There’s nothing wrong with your face.”

“Then there’s nothing wrong with yours either. Or your arm, or any other part of you that isn’t 'perfectly' human looking. I happen to find you very handsome Nick Valentine and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one. But I got here first so, dibs.”

He opened his mouth but for once, nothing came out. It took another minute for him to reply “Did you just call dibs on me?” He looked at her in amazement.

“Yes.” She replied simply, moving back a bit. “But I’m still not interested in sex and that’s a me thing, not a you thing if you remember the conversation we had months ago about why I had a son in the first place.” She paused and looked him over. “Well I guess that’s always been my own awkward are you really sure you want to get involved with someone like me question. Fair is fair, what’s your answer Valentine?”

He chuckled, almost relieved that was it. “I’m not not one of those fancy gen 3’s doll. I’m fine without it. Never really had an interest either.” He paused with some thought and a smirk. “I do like this kissing thing though.”

“I take back everything bad I ever said about my luck.” Kim laughed at his teasing. “Now I just have to tempt you into letting me lean against you as I sleep and oh wait you let me do that already. We apparently have been dating for longer then we suspected.”

“Oh is that what we’ve been doing? I must have missed the memo.”

“Well semi dating. I think it’s official now that we’ve actually owned up to our feelings like real adults.”

“Right, the hard part.”

“And Nick?” Kim looked up. “If I haven’t made it clear yet. Yes, this is exactly what I want. I love you, I don’t care how many times I have to tell you that because it’s true. I love you. If anyone tries to say otherwise they’re a liar and I will punch them.”

Nick smiled, “I love you too Kim.”

“Good. Now can I get another kiss?”

“You only have to ask.” This time he leaned down and she wrapped her arms around his neck. It was less awkward this time, still strange but pleasant, and when Kim let go she reached out for his hand again and he carefully placed the metal one with hers.

“See. You just have to get used to it.”

“People might-”

“People might anything. I don’t care about people who might. I care about our friends and while I’m sure MacCready and Cait might say a few things, that’s just how they show they care. I don’t think anyone will really be surprised.”

He paused for a moment then shook his head. “You may be right. I think the Railroad might actually be running a betting pool.”

Kim laughed at that. “That would explain why Deacon helped with the coat. Now come on.”

“Where are we going?”

“To tell people. Ellie isn’t here but my family, Codsworth, is so we’re telling him first.”

“You don’t think he’ll mind?”

“Are you kidding, you’ve been one of his favourites since the day we met you. It was his idea to put an extra bed in my room when you refused to take up any space in the town because you’re so damn noble. Looking back on it, I think he was trying to hint something.”

“No kidding.” He had to admit that was a bit of a surprise. He’d always got along with Codsworth but the robot always seemed so parental towards Kim.

“Yeah. Apparently we both suck at detecting our own love life. But even if he wasn’t trying to hint anything, he’s family so he’ll be happy for me. Just like Ellie is going to be happy for you.”

“Considering how many times she and Piper have been telling me to just get over myself and tell you, I think you’re right.”

“You totally figured it out before I did, didn’t you.” Kim shook her head with amused exasperation. “And here I was worried that you wouldn’t feel the same way as I did.”

“Now that’s crazy talk.” Nick mused. “And yeah, it was a bit of a mess up there for a while, not used to those sorta emotions but I think I figured it out after you helped me with Winters. I just didn’t...” He trialed off, not sure what to say.

“Didn’t want to say anything because you are too good for this world and don’t believe you deserve anything nice.”

“Ah, not the way I’d put it-”

“Which is why it’s a good thing I’m here now.” She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.

He was still smiling fondly as Kim walked hand in hand with him down the street and some of the people began to take notice.

-

Kim was the sort of person that brought people up, made them better. People loved her, he’d seen it in many peoples faces as they’d moved through the wasteland. Some of them had even approached her and were politely yet firmly turned aside. And somehow he was the one she laughed and traded banter with. He was the one she opened up to the most, trusted the most. He wasn’t even human and yet she treated him like someone not something and at that, like someone worth loving.

He had been so sure that this would go wrong, that his feelings were just memory residue. That she couldn’t possibly be interested in him or that he wouldn’t be enough and yet, he’d been wrong. Time and time again he’d been wrong.

He’d never been so glad to be wrong in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and done
> 
> At least this part. I've got plans for more stories. But I finally got this one up.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed it. If you want to leave a kudos or a comment that would be love. c: Even if it's just to rant with me about how all video games need hug buttons. /no I will not let that go.


End file.
